14 DAY TRIAL // Sinead O’Connor is still writing open letters to Miley Cyrus (she’s currently at her fifth), urging her to apologize for mocking her on Twitter for being “crazy” but she’s not the only one trying to get in touch with the former Disney star this way. Singer-songwriter Sufjan Stevens also is.
However, he has other things to bring to Miley’s attention than her awful fashion and the negative message she’s sending young girls because of her recent “makeover.”
Sufjan just wants Miley to know that her grammar is just as bad, as he makes it clear in a hilarious post on his blog.
“Dear Miley. I can’t stop listening to #GetItRight (great song, great message, great body), but maybe you need a quick grammar lesson. One particular line causes concern: ‘I been laying in this bed all night long.’ Miley, technically speaking, you’ve been LYING, not LAYING, an irregular verb form that should only be used when there’s an object, i.e. ‘I been laying my tired booty on this bed all night long’,” he writes.
“Whatever. I’m not the best lyricist, but you know what I mean. #Get It Right The Next Time. But don’t worry, even Faulkner messed it up. We all make mistakes, and surely this isn’t your worst misdemeanor,” Sufjan concedes.
However, since he’s already on the topic, he takes the time out to point another mistake in the same line.
“Miley, did you know the tense here is also totally wrong. Surely you’ve heard of Present Perfect Continuous Tense (I HAVE BEEN LYING in this bed all night long [hopefully getting some beauty sleep?]). It’s a weird, equivocal, almost purgatorial tense, not quite present, not quite past, not quite here, not quite there. Somewhere in between. I feel that way all the time. It kind of sucks,” he says.
Just in case Miley feels offended by the unsolicited grammar lesson, Sufjan ends his open letter with an amazing message of love and support.
“Girl, you work it like Mike Tyson. Miley, I love you because you’re the Queen, grammatically and anatomically speaking. And you’re the hottest cake in the pan. Don’t ever grow old. Live brightly before your fire fades into total darkness,” he writes.
His post has already gone viral but, as of now, Miley is yet to respond to it.