14 DAY TRIAL // Ever experienced the desire to be older than you were as a young man/woman? Ever had the unconscious or involuntary urge to say you were older than you were just because you wanted to sound and look more mature, to gain more credibility and support or even an advantageous image in the world of grown-ups, but as time passed by and you grew older, you realized that you had been rushing all along to reach an age you were going to reach anyway and even sooner than you expected? I experienced this feeling (and still do) many times in many ways, in many situations and I'm sure lots of you did (and still do) too. I guess it's only natural to be or feel older than you are because this way one feels more important, maybe more in tune with the world, has the illusion of having more experience, of knowing more things than he/she knows, of dealing with things better, of becoming more of who he/she is. This is basically the consequence of acting on the "oldie but goldie" principle that older is better, and maybe more fulfilling and rewarding from many points of view, since becoming older means one is getting closer to the "grandfather of all knowledge" status. (Which I must admit is very appealing to some). Yet, when we really do reach a certain old age, we realize we were better off when we are kids, and some of us even begin acting like one, so it's probably all a mater of perspective, of perceiving time: it's fast when we are young, because we want it to be, and all too slow when we get old, because we don't want it to be. Humans are truly fast-paced animals; human nature, on the other hand is never satisfied with what is already there, but with what is not and apparently should be.
George Carlin, an Irish American stand-up comedian and author, winner of many Grammy awards, known for his attitude and observations on language, psychology and religion, along with many other taboo subjects, made a wonderful review on this issue, based on several all too truthful observations and associations between real age and wishful thought of age.
According to him, the only time we really LIKE getting older is when we are children. When we are less than 10 years old, we are so pleased by the fact that we are apparently growing up so fast that we are thinking in fractions of a year. Remember that when we ask kids how old they are, most of them answer in years and fractions like "I'm four years and a half". A grown up man or woman would never say they are 36 years old... and a half. But when you are four years... AND a half, it's different, you're older.
When we're teenagers, we're at a point where we cannot stop. Cases when teenagers fake their ages, easily and willingly saying they are older than they really are, became all too well known, and the reasons may be multiple, from being able to buy alcohol-based drinks to getting inside a raunchy club (or even watching TV if I come to think about one episode of the very well inspired "Dexter's Laboratory" cartoon series). If you ask them how old they are, they will reply "I will be 16!", even though they are just 13. The current age doesn't matter since they WILL BE 16. The prospect of an older age that is seemingly just around the corner is more than addictive and pleasant.
When we've reached 18, or 21 respectively, it's like a dream come true: the grandest day of our life is there, the one we've been waiting to reach. Even words sound like a ceremony: YOU'RE OF AGE!" Then, in a blink of an eye, we just turned 30. Things are well but not what we really expected, we feel something wrong is happening or about to happen, just like when we see dark storm clouds on the horizon: the rain is not there but it will come. Most people in their 30s feel like sour milk, because sour milk "turns" into that state and is good for throwing to the dust bin. We're not funny anymore, we've turned sour, and so we ask ourselves what is wrong, what has happened. We do some rapid math calculations and we get this: we BECAME of age, we ARE 30 and we're GOING ON 40. It's like time is going too fast all of a sudden and we think that at this pace, we'll reach 50 without even knowing it, and all our dreams for the future are torn to pieces.
But then again, we're GOING TO BE 60 and it hadn't even crossed our minds that this could happen. So math assessment again: we BECOME of age, we ARE 30, we're GOING ON 40, we REACH 50 and we're GOING TO BE 60. Time is flying past us with the speed of light, so at one point you can say "Hey touchdown for me: I'm 70!!" After this threshold falls behind, it's the "one day to another" principle: you're WAITING to reach next Wednesday. By the time you're 80, every single day is like completing a whole new cycle: till lunch, then till 4.30 in the afternoon, and then what do you know? You reached tonight as well.
90 means going back little by little:" I JUST got to 92", then the strangest thing happens: after 100, you become a child once again "I'm a hundred... AND A HALF!"
Here are few pieces of advice given by the same George Carlin, on how to stay young (some of them might sound corny or old fashioned or "so last Tuesday" but I bet we won't think they are when we'll be older). One of the things we should do is to ignore unessential numbers, like age, weight or height, leave the doctors bother with them since this is why we pay them for. We should surround ourselves with generally happy friends, the "gloom and doom" ones might be depressing in the end. We should learn, study PCs, crafts, gardening anything, but never let the brain get the "idle" status, as "the idle mind is the devil's workshop" which may come under the form of Alzheimer. Savor simple things, laugh a lot till you can't breathe anymore, try to come to terms peacefully with things that hurt or are painful, value health, don't look for assuming a blame it is not yours, and tell people you love them.
Hope I'll see you when you reach 100... and a half!
