Why Is Everyone So Mean These Days?

Why are people so mean?Hm,it's a human nature.Human-being as a part of the animal world are selfish and fighting for survival.Each creature is selfish in its own way-try to take a piece of meat away from your sweet pet-dog,you take a risk to be bitten.Folks are the same.Of cause,there are few things,which distinguish us from beasts-culture,good manners,rules of co-existence,but all these things are to be brought up and cultivated.This process takes mush time,efforts and spiritual sufferings,though the result is known-THE MAN (I mean not the sex,but the member of the mankind).
Let us ask ourselves if we are ready to work on ourselves.
Personally,I have learnt(I hope,at least)to ignore unsavoury individuals and have been creating my own criteria to appraise people.We SHALL NOT alter the human nature and we SHOULDN'T fritter our emotions away on digesting undeserved insults all kinds of freaks do to us.There will always be "good guys-bad guys".The real problem is to take time to run into "good guys" within our life-time.
Yours,
Good Guy(I hope)

I disagree that being mean is human nature. Children are so loving and kind and sometimes selfish, but they look for love and kindness to thrive. It is the nurture of these children that make them cruel and mean. Every time that cruelty is rewarded and kindness is shunned, it teaches the children what is expected of them. Children, being eager to please, will easily fit into the habit of being cruel if expected to.

Hey - I read all of these posts and I think they are all the same thing: Bullying. It's not about meaness....its all about bullying. It's the same thing we all experienced in elementary school....it just never goes away. Teachers teach kids how to "handle" bullying by using "I" statements: I don't like the way you teased me, please stop.

It never worked in Grade 5 and it won't work now. It's just plain old bullying. I was a young rising superstar in the financial world and got bullied out of my job by mean people. I decided to teach kids. I was a up and rising young teacher who the kids loved and I was HATED by my co=workers.

I am middle aged now, and I fear for my children. The world is a hateful place. I take every measure to teach them to love and respect. I hope they have a better go at than I did.

i think your a moron degenrate high school dropout ulgy pice of crap that has nothign better to do on teh internert tnhat to rite stopiud commentis about unintersitng things

@scotty b Sounds like a troll who doesn't think twice before putting a reply to a comment.

Clearly you have nothing better to do on the internet, instead you troll/vent and reply to others that you think have to do with the nice ones just because you are bothered by this article which otherwise proves my point. Plus not to mention you can't even spell correctly in your post in regards to this.

I'm pretty sure that you have now contradicted yourself on so many levels, really.. you do. This article explains exactly your actions obviously proving the existence of mean people. I must say congratulations! You have now deemed the article poster's point of fact that you represent the cruelty displayed by the world. =]

women have become so dam nasty and mean today. why is that? not to mention, many of them have such a rotten no good attitude problem now. that is why, us men have trouble meeting a good woman for us now.

No one really knows what human nature is, on account of the lack of knowledge about people in a state of nature. The only thing we can say for sure is that people "absorb" their culture. Look throughout history and this holds true. We live
In a society where "mean-ness" is encouraged and the only way to change it us to act in such a way to influence those who surround you. Be the change!

I've recently read a self-help book (Yes, I know, don't rub it in) that had a very good explanation of this. There are two ways to take in all the frustrations from the world: 1) know that you are in control and have responsibility over everything in your life, and you can respond to everything either positively or negatively; and 2) know that every one and their dog out there is responsible for your misery and question, "Why can't I be the one that hit lottery!?"
Well, it just so happens that most people, unfortunately, choose the latter - out of fear, jealousy, and by what so many negative people teach us in our everyday lives. We make each other feel BETTER about ourselves by criticizing.
That is the problem with our culture these days: We are constantly reminded that being "successful" means to be rich, have a family, a house, and 2 kids, that we forget sometimes it is successful just to be nice and have a good time. We don't even take the time to sit down and figure out why most of us are so latently angry, and the only way by which we express that is being mean to other people "you don't care about" in every little way you can.

well said.

This is so refreshing to read. I agree a lot of people are mean. But I guess it's up to us nice people to make their world better and make people realize there is nice people out there.

It sounds like a vicious cycle: people hurting people because they've been hurt in the past.

i dont understand when saying "people are mean because they are hurt". Most of us get hurt and I'm sure most of us are nice in here to actually write or reply in this article. I've been hurt so much in my life, but I'm not mean to anyone; I'm always be nice and polite. I really don't think being hurt is to be mean to people, so I can feel better. I just hope there are more nice people in this world and there are people who care.

I love this article and I also ask myself the same question over and over. I believe people are mean because they have nothing else to live for and or are so sad. Like you said, people are hurting inside and the only way for them to keep the "hurting" alive is to be mean and hateful to others. I have come across with a few of those individuals and believe me is not a pretty side. My most recent one was a co-worker and she was horrible. You can see the hate coming out of her eyes and literally her body would tremble with all the hate she had inside. God have mercy on us! We do need to find peace and love in the midst of so much hate that surrounds this world.

for the scotty b person, comment , also the comment on anonymous posts .well for us who have come across hatefull people . you have both just made me rest my case. and the other thing is often times people never take a look in the mirror. maybe you have never come across a hatefull person , or was it that you couldn't notice it, well i'm sure you have and had plenty to say then two. right?

Well, I agree. Over the last few years, it's been rough. People have been SO MEAN to me. Ungrateful, rude, deliberately abrasive and malicious. It's sad to live in a world where even fellow supposed children of God display such hateful behavior. Yes, human beings have been hurt. We ALL have been mistreated or neglected by someone. However! That doesn't nor will ever in the future justify being a jerk to someone who did nothing to deserve it. It's a choice to be mean and it's a choice to be nice. I choose to be nice.
I remember a year ago when I went to Saddleback College, I brought candy to my Music Appreciation class being a nice guy. NOBODY said thank you :( ! The fellow christians Benjamin Kletchner and Amanda Vaughn and another mean girl whose name I don't know all just laughed hysterically when nobody thanked me. I told myself I won't let it get to me. when I reminiscence about it, I do get a little sad but I feel proud of myself in knowing I'm under God's Surveillance. I'd rather be the nice guy who wasn't acknowledged than be the asshole! :)

I can completely relate, for some reason, people have been so cruel to me, and I've done nothing to deserve it.

Awesome! love your wise insights!

'Mean' people act before they think and 'Nice' people think before they act.
No one is always nice, but the people that think before they act will most of the time be polite and caring towards others, possibly put their selves in the other persons shoes before shouting out a trite insult.

Mean people may get fame and fortune through torture and sacrifice of their own friends and family but they will never have what a real human being needs... love.

Well said! :)

love rules our world
hate destroys

There's always going to mean people in the world, no matter how you try to slice and dice it.
Today, for instance, my husband and I went to the supermarket. As we were walking across the parking lot, this car pulled up next to us, intending to park in the handicapped space we were just about to pass. We hurried up so the guy could park his car, and he still rolled down his window and yelled at us to hurry up. When my husband and I got to the front of the store, he yelled out that next time he would run us over. We just shook our heads and went in the store. While in the produce section, the guy walked near us, points at us to his wife saying, "That's them." Then he purposely walked across the produce section so that he could pass right by us. The whole time my husband kept his eye on him, because the guy was just breathing heavy from his anger towards us. It was just unbelievable. People are so mean and so crazy! Let's just say, I couldn't wait to get out of that store.

After a few bad days of encountering astoudingly rude people I googled a question of why people are so mean and came upon this article. I guess in some ways it helps to know I am not the only one frustrated and discouraged over what seems to be an increasing prevalence of just downright mean and nasty people. I think it's harder to let this kind of behavior "role off my back" because I am a kind and sensitive person and I truly enjoy being so. I can't understand how anyone can be happy when they treat others badly. Obviously they probably aren't. I know you can't change people, you can only change your reaction to them. So I struggle to work on not feeling so hurt and saddened when people interact badly and not take it personally. It is so hard to remember that in general, when people are rude and mean it actually has nothing to do with you. There is no solution other than changing the way we react to such behavior. Sadly this is so much easier said than done! This article is great.

yes and wouldn't we just love for everyone in the world to read these posts . guess i always hope that if they only could see and hear how they look an sound they wouldn't do it any more. yea yea i know never happen.but i still pray for GOD to change the hearts of man. What so ever we pray for never comes back void. have a good day all . LA.

Yes today's world fosters a cruel edge to life. Few regard their fellow beings with respect. It would be so easy for all of us to fall into that pattern and reward eye for an eye. The best remedy is pledge to do an act of kindness every day. Who knows it might catch on.

I think People are just mean sometimes....nothing new about that.....look at a baby when they dont get there own way...they scream and whail arms and cry and pout..latest science shows mean people actually get pleasure ..out of being mean..prolly we all have been mean in life sometimes not realising it..so i guess its all about facing that the human race can be a destructive bioligical build up of talking plasma who loves watching tv.. ..welcome to the human race..a overpopulated bunch of babies who get mad when they dont get there own way(im not ecluded lol)..and yes...the real mean people will even use biohazard warfaare along with nucleaur warfarre on eachother..and even torture eachother...all becus they want there way...those ego eccentric babies are really the REAL BIG BULLY BABIES..
silly human race... and sometimes yet we can be so beautiful ..so in the end all we can do is pray for grace for eachother before we all destroy eachother! and some will get mad because i used the word .."pray"..so i think the only way we all can be nice and never ever to be mean again is...to load us down with an infinitive amount of cable tv stations and for the governments to pay us to watch tv ..we will be so busy trying to watch all those tv stations we will never have time to fight...well that is if your married...than the fight for the remote will occur..so i guess we should maybe stick to praying for grace :>
GodBless!
renkent77@yahoo.com

you are so right. most people will never change so we must live our lives as happy as we can.

I'm in college, and I know what you are talking about. More and more people are incapable of being kind and polite. All anyone cares about is sports, fitting in, and their own looks (or other people's looks)... I bet a lot of these people are stuckup snobs who think that the world revolves around them and everything they got was provided by their parents. They think they are hot stuff, but they can't fool me. Do unto other as they would do unto you. But they will come to a point in their lives where they realize they are just an ugly a**** who has no real friends and no real lover. If you use people for your own advantage, people will use you!

But I can say, I do happen to find some nice people to hang around with, who are actually capable of having a conversation with. I love to talk to people who have a sense of humor and are easy to get along with. I only wish there were more of these people around... It's getting harder and harder to find now of days. All of my girlfriends were easygoing and fun to talk to, weren't concerned too much about money, and didn't judge your every move. And all of my best friends are people who have a genuine love for people and are willing to give a helping hand, and don't talk about how they are so great and don't talk about frat parties everyday.

It's funny because I was actually doing exactly what Jenny did. I had a tough day and googled "why are people so mean?" and found this article. I guess I just have trouble sometimes understanding why people can't just interact more civilly with others. I mean, I get that not everyone has to treat me like the their best friend but why be mean to someone you don't even know? I have to remember their behavior has nothing to do with me but I am just the type of person who has difficulty getting over this type of behavior. Maybe I need to just not be so sensitive, but I just can't let go of the feeling that our culture has become more and more tolerant of rude, hostile and just plain violent behavior.

Thank you for this article. i also googled "why are people mean" and ended up here. The world depresses me. I can be okay when people are mean and critical of me usually (not always), but I can't STAND hearing people be mean and hurtful about/to others. I even hate getting online anymore because everything anyone says in message boards almost is just name calling and hurtful. Of course there should be differences of opinions and free speach- but there is a difference between rational arguing where everyone says something of substance and learns from each other and just plain hurtful and rude name calling that does not lead to ANY intellectual growth etc etc. I am 23 so I have not been alive long enough to know if there is a significant change in the world (with people becoming more and more mean), but it seems like a lot of older people I know believe that. It's depressing.

P.S. good points in the article

Well. I'm 38 and live in one country that has been listed as the happiest in the world. If that's true then the whole world has gone to H***. Anyway, it was a nicer place but then in the '90s everyone became more materialistic because of availability of more money and technology. Suddenly, people who didn't get much respect in society felt that had the status symbols to show they arrived. The problem is and was that they lacked the most important status symbol, etiquette. As the economy winds down they are scratching out eyes to hold on to their dream. I expect that eventually they'll learn some manners when they can no longer use perceived wealth to manipulate others. Until then it will be a bumpy ride. Just recently I was verbally attacked by a woman who believed it was her right to jump ahead of me in line. She called me the dirtiest names she could imagine and truly, I wanted to give her a whipping. However, I was firm and she had to take her childish self to the back of the line. You would think the others in the line would be outraged by her behaviour but I think she frightened them. After all, so many people become violent with least provocation these days. Let's hope there are enough of us nice guys out there to be the seed of the next revolution.

Like other people here I was having a very painful couple of days and felt very alone but thankfully found this site. If you watch T.V. and just anywhere on the net people can really be brutal. Any late night talk show and even Saturday Night Live are almost never funny anymore. They've replaced any humor with making "fun" of people's appearance and trying to destroy them. Even TMZ. Calling nearly everyone "ugly" or "failures". People seem to spend too much time watching T.V. or online and thinking that that is an acceptable way to treat anyone. It's really sad.

I totally understand. I NEVER watch tv or go online, only to check my email or search this question..lol. Too many mean people, too much violence, too much materialism, judgement...well, negativity, period!! I like to walk, read nice things, and spend special time with my family. More important, true, and nice. God bless everyone!

I totally agree. I always have wondered why the world is so cruel. I wonder why God allows such behavior, despite all of our blessings. I even get laughed at by strangers on the road for a mean people suck bumper sticker I have lol... God Bless everone and you will feel alot better about yourself if you build someone up not tear them down. ;)

Strange. I was sitting here in tears a second ago. I'm just sick of how everyone treats me and my friends. I googled "Why Is Everyone So Mean?", and this article turned up. Here's what I don't understand. If we are all aware of the problem, why does it even still exist? What is gonna have to happen for people to be nice to each other?

it is sad to say what i am gonna say, i am a 54 year old man, just turned 54, 3 days ago. i have seen a lot in my years, what i have seen was people like these mean people will have regrets, i have seen people become sick or even worse. latest there was this man i meant at one of my men club, i meant him about 6 months prior, he use to call me * stupid and he even made a rude comment about my wife, now jsut to let you know i am retired, five years ago and am doing ok financially, now this may sound like that's all he said, no this was just some example, anyway about a year laterafter meetin him this same man was found dead in his apartment. well maybe the way he treated me did not cause his death but maybe he knew he was dying and he just wanted to make a sensitive person like me feel bad with him. well he did not make me feel bad, use to people like this, just keep being that nice person you want to be, it will pay off

Sad but true. Life is too short to be miserable and make other's feel bad by being nasty to them. Everyone has there "oh poor me" stories, but everyone has had something bad happen in their life. Why carry it through you entire life in lashing out to others who haven't done anything to you. Family can be the most hurtful. You can choose your friends but not your family. Amen!!! That is a whole other story. Don't have regrets because one day you will look back (hopefully) and have regrets about your actions. Words and stones do hurt.

Comment #19.1 by: jimmy on 02 Sep 2011, 11:28 GMT

it is sad to say what i am gonna say, i am a 54 year old man, just turned 54, 3 days ago. i have seen a lot in my years, what i have seen was people like these mean people will have regrets, i have seen people become sick or even worse. latest there was this man i meant at one of my men club, i meant him about 6 months prior, he use to call me * stupid and he even made a rude comment about my wife, now jsut to let you know i am retired, five years ago and am doing ok financially, now this may sound like that's all he said, no this was just some example, anyway about a year laterafter meetin him this same man was found dead in his apartment. well maybe the way he treated me did not cause his death but maybe he knew he was dying and he just wanted to make a sensitive person like me feel bad with him. well he did not make me feel bad, use to people like this, just keep being that nice person you want to be, it will pay off

The world will never experience true peace. Humans are just naturally selfish.

i wonder why people are so mean when i read wat you wrote iwonder why people are so mean

To answer your question...Are you listening,comprehension..The people responding to this article are obviously the NICE people in this world...Im just saying...

why people are so mean ?you my sister is a mean little girl and she is older than me ,some day she will get wat she sould get long time ago .i know why people is so mean because when we wern't born yet other's were mean to them well i don't care wat happened to them before they should just let their past GO.

i agree my. somepeople just are not nice. like i try hardto do thigs but all i get back is "ohh you could have done it this way try harder!" What the hec, whoever is mean should know that they are mean and just cool it i know you want to stand out to yourself' so do it STAND OUT FOR YOU!!! trust me it will be ok!!
-thanks

I too have been having a rough time in the last couple of wks, well actually a yr of one thing after the next. Yrs ago I used to wk in retail and would get a customer that was so rude they was sickening then I would always seem to get a really nice customer. I guess what I'm saying is that negativity always seems to out shine positive things. Maybe its they way we're wired but we always remember the negative situations more vividly then the positive ones. I do think we have a mean spirited society. I don't remember tv having so many shows based on catty comments. I remember in the 80's the only show on celebrites lives was Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. Society in general has the attitude of "I'm going to get him/her before they get me" & the "I'm going to tell you like it is or like I think you are!" I think a lot of people feel like being nice is some how allowing others to take advantage of them. I know, really warped but thats what it seems like to mean. Think about on the highway when everyone has to merge and how at the very least everyone should let @ least one person get in front of them....now think about how many people don't do that...really sad. Good Luck to all the nice people! At least one day the meek shall inherit the earth!

I feel that same way, it is so sad that people are so mean and so eager to hurt other people.I love your comment about one the meek ones will live on the earth

People are mean because they have a sin nature and Satan knows it and takes advantage of it. All of humanity's hurts are cyclical, and the cycles will continue unless the cycle is broken. In essence, it is generational--Hurt, pain, anger, affliction, etc., all carried on and passed down from generation to generation. The sin cycle can be broken, however! Through repentence and salvation from Jesus Christ! The awesomely freeing and joyous gift of God's grace fills inward voids of hurts, pain, anger, affliction, etc.; causing them to melt away, sparing the next generation that dasterdly repetitive cycle.
Kindness is truly contagious.
Merry Christmas
Peace in Christ Jesus,
Christine

Hey Christine

Thank you so much for your post. You are truly a woman of God! :] I feel better since I posted that comment/review. Nothing has changed in terms of the world. (MOST) People are STILL MEAN AND HATEFUL. It's just my attitude is better. I have ALWAYS been a sensitive person and I always try to show love and kindness towards other people. I still do, I'm just more selective as to whom I allow to see my kind spirit since I'm still cautious. I've had conversations with my Momma who I love dearly and we both agree that Satan is the root cause of people's sinful behavior increasing. Nevertheless, I realize THESE ARE THE LAST DAYS. The world is coming to an end! It's just important for all of us nice people on this site to remain kind, loving, sweet, friendly, etc. regardless of other people's behavior. I hope everybody has had a Good New Year thus yar and Happy Belated Valentine's Day. God bless y'all! Peace!

I totally agree. Is there anyone nice on the planet?

So now, where do I find the forum on how to GET EVEN with these mean people and teach them a lesson. I am tired of being a nice guy and I am ready to start putting some of these mean people in their place. How can I get under their skin as much as they get under mine? Being passive and just absorbing all the negativity is not a solution for me anymore.

Hey Niceguy,

Continue to be nice. Getting even is not worth it and I don't think you would like yourself. You're a nice guy.

I just do not understand why people are so smart at being evil but yet they can not be smart enough to respect other people's lives.

Know when you get those silly texts that bless you and then ask you to send to ten people and if you don't something may happen. I really don't like them anyways but its just what the kids send me, and it keeps me informed with the latest with my neices. I don't take them to heart anyways. So I sent one like I have been with a sister. She in turn sent me the UGLIEST audio text I have ever heard. Every other word was the F word. It started out You are my F friend, etc, every other word is an F word. I felt so disguisted that I wanted to throw up. Literally. And expecially from my sister. I replied with "wow" I have never gotten a text so awful ever" "I would never send u a text like that". She replied about an hour later. That was just a joke. I won't happen again. No Im sorry I offended you. What the hell is the world coming to. I'm still shocked and I really don't know If I want to respond to her ever again. I keep thinking her husband the "jerk" had something to do with it. He has her like a puppet. Tells her what to do, think, feel and say. I wouldint' doubt it. But sister get a voice of your own. I wish, for her sake. He's cleaning the floors with her. SO SAD........

I'm asking the same question.I'm a naturally good and nice person even though I can b a sailormouth when I'm excited.And I try t'be nice to people everyday but sadly not all of'em get the message.I've had people tell me to, excuse my French, "get the fuck on", or words along those lines or say cutting remarks.It really hurts.Sometimes I wonder what's the point of bein nice 2 people if they're gonna do u like the press did MJ or Anna Nicole Smith.I sometimes wish all the nice people went to a happy place and everyone else were left to kill each otha with their hostility.not a good thought but it's the truth.

People have been mistreating each other for millions of years. It's nothing new. Ultimately, our cooperative nature tends to win out, which is why we all aren't extinct. I got curious once about just how many people were true rat bastards. You know, complete sociopaths that lack even a shred of empathy for their fellow man. It turns out there was actually a university study in game theory that psychologically profiled its subjects and (sort of accidently) determined that from 1 to 4% (The percentage was higher for men) of people were complete bastards who would back stab you at any given moment if they thought it gave them the slightest advantage. Interestingly, that is about the same percentage of the U.S. population currently in prison.

So the good news is that there are more nice people than mean people, and society works hard to weed them out. I imagine everyone who doesn't fit the sociopathic profile could fall anywhere along a bell curve ranging from mostly nice to mostly mean, with Ghandi at one extreme and Charles Manson at the other, but overall I think we all get along. I suspect there is a perfectly sound evolutionary reason for it, too. Notce that true saints on the nice end of the spectrum tend to get snuffed out eventually: Ghandi, Martin Luther, Jesus. I think mother nature has determined that there is such a thing as being too nice for your own good: Too many sheep, and the wolves run wild. Too many wolves, and the herd is hunted into extinction.

The problem I think we face today as a society isn't rudeness, but the ability of technology to magnify the rudeness of a just ONE of those rat bastards we all fear and hate to a level that goes beyond merely annoying.

2 - 2006
1 - 2007
4 - 2008
18 - 2009

And 5 posts (well, 6 including mine) just in January of 2010 alone. ...Noticing a trend? Just thought it was interesting. Could mean nothing.
I'm sure most people don't come back here to read replies.. probably forget about this page once they let out their opinions, but for anyone wanting to put mean people in their place, what joy would you get out of it? That you took them down a couple of notches? Would that make you feel good? Sure, it might feel good at first to let out your frustrations and confront them, perhaps to try to humble them and make them feel as they have made others feel.. but you know what? Each person is different. You might think it will give you great satisfaction, but if you truly are a nice person, or if it's just who you are, it's going to make you feel crappy inside. You could have mixed feelings. A part of you that was glad you did it, and another part regretting it. Remember, mean people have feelings/issues/hurt inside just as much as the next person.
Instead of trying to "get even", or taking all the crude remarks, sarcasm, etc. from them (none of which is satisfactory), try to understand where their hostility is coming from. Ask them, straight out. (And hey, you can't change a person anyway, but maybe you can shed some light on their personality, as well as making them more aware of their own).

Bottom line, we don't need more mean people in this world. If you can't at least get through to them, ignore them. Don't give up and turn into one.

I think the answer to this spiraling hatred has alot to do with parenting. Think about most kids who are mean or adults who are selfish and inconsiderate. If it's true what they say that it takes 21 days to form a habit then we are in a world of trouble! Cause habits are hard to break and we are talking a lifetime of bad habitual parenting that's going on in this world. There's the chain that needs to be broken. The question is how do you get the a**hole parents to stop tainting their kids with their problems. Of coarse there are those parents that provide a roof over their kids heads, food, money, etc..but lack values and respect for others. If those parents stopped thinking about themselves for one second and try to teach their kids good (and kind) acts and behaviors then maybe there's that chance it will turn into a habit...problem is not many can take their minds off of themselves for a moment to actually help their kids become an asset to society. Their kids are just a product of what they learned. It's sorta sad really and we all see where those kids end up...I know not all do but most do end up in deep crap. All I can say is be sure that if you have kids or when you do have them, teach them good habits in kindness inspite of what your'e going through and maybe the chain can break little by little.

I am mean. I drove many people away before I realized what I was doing. Once I realized, I became totally withdrawn and stayed away from others. I've been living like a hermit for about 10 years now.

It took me many years to discover why I was mean. The reason is that I am living my life with someone who has been abusive and I cannot find a way out of the situation. I feel helpless and hopeless. Sometimes, the only way out seems to be for me to end it all.

This incredible frustration has made me lash out at others. I would never admit this except anonymously, but I am angry at those supposedly closest to me because nobody has offered any help. I lash out.

I also seem to be ultra sensitive and take things that peoplr say personally....things that never would have bothered me long ago. I feel hurt easily and I lash out at those who I perceive have hurt me.

I know exactly what you mean. I'm only 15, I'm glad I caught on to this early. Im a freshman in highschool. It's valentines day and my boyfriend broke up with me. I blamed others. I blamed everyone for my misfortunes. It was never my fault.
Until today, I thought like that. Now I know that true happiness comes from making others happy. And that I, am wrong. I am not right all the time. And I don't get what I want out of life from being mean. Repect, love, and care is what makes true happiness. :)

Comment #18 by: Brent on 22 Jul 2009, 15:31 GMT reply to this comment
I totally agree. I always have wondered why the world is so cruel. I wonder why God allows such behavior, despite all of our blessings. I even get laughed at by strangers on the road for a mean people suck bumper sticker I have lol... God Bless everone and you will feel alot better about yourself if you build someone up not tear them down. ;)





Maybe they are mean to you because you god bless people who don't want to hear your dogma bs.

Hey, one thing I can say about Hindus, Christians, Muslims, Buddhists etc. that I can't say about my fellow atheists is that, if a person is hurting, they will lend a hand. (I've had some really rough times and it's always religious people that come to my rescue. Say what you will about their fantasies, something in their upbringing is going right.)

Not all dogma is bs (the 'do the right thing' bit certainly isn't.)

What I don't get is when you are being nice to people, they treat you like crap...but when you treat them like crap, then they are nice to you. Someone please explain.

I see that at work all the time! Im a server, and a fellow server of mine talks to the new hosts and servers like they are trash under his feet, then before i know it they all just love him to death. Meanwhile, I am especially nice to all the new employees because i feel that the need to make them feel welcome and comfortable, but most of them become total smart asses to me. Of course, that one fellow server i was talking about? He does drugs, and it turns out that most of our new employees do too. So they have that in common. I honestly think so many people are "popping" pills and whatnot that THAT is the reason everyone is so ugly, because they distort your perspective AND your personality. And if you're not into the drugs and can't "hook them up" then your out of the loop.

"Every time I bestow a vacant office I make a hundred discontented persons and one ingrate."-Louis XIV.

I chalk it up to human nature. For some reason, people read kindness as weakness or subservience. It's nonsense of course but, we have to understand that this is how they perceive reality. Therefore, observe people carefully and bestow kindness to the deserving. For everyone else just try to do no harm.

They think you're being a phony if you aren't mean, mainly due to the fact that they are living in a cruel world.

I don't really feel that people are impolite or mean because they're sad; often, it's simply because they like to have fun at the other person's expense. A lot of society pushes to break taboos, and while this is a wonderful thing, at times (imagine all of the people today who would not have gotten anywhere had they not dared) some people also conclude that this means bucking everything traditional--including politeness. Young people and older people are both arrogant in two separate ways; the young are narcissistic and think that they can shirk politeness because, well, f*** the other person. It's not like they care, right? (Hint: they do, you silly teenager.) The older generation is arrogant and tends to think that they're absolutely righteous in everything they do. (Hint: you're a human. You're not infallible or above a 'thank you'.) Simply put, the people either don't care, think breaking etiquette in extreme ways is funny, or just think you're beneath them. Trust me, I'm on the receiving end of this A LOT.

We live to treat another as we treat objects; once upon a time, objects were treated with care. These days, they're disposable. I think, in some ways, because parents haven't taught their children that things can't be replaced (from an early age), that the children have grown up thinking that people can be as easily destroyed and replaced as their toys and utilities were and that it's no big deal.

This site is wonderful.. I also googled "why are people so mean ".I live a life where i am surrounded by negative people, and I find it hard to be happy, I'm not innocent , i have mistreated a few people in my life, but i always have come to regret it and feel sad when i did such things. but i I feel as though i have to protect myself from others, I feel i hurt people because they keep hurting me.

"What I don't get is when you are being nice to people, they treat you like crap...but when you treat them like crap, then they are nice to you. Someone please explain. "

People are paranoid and think you want something from them. They see your genuine politeness as an act of deception.

The reason people are so mean? They are spiritually dead. I think we can blame lack of religion for that one. Religion provides a basis for morality and love of human life, and heightens positive emotions that promote kindness, love, and most importantly empathy towards the rest of humanity.

I was feeling a bit down because a girl at University had bene picking on me. She would steal my food, write mean notes under my door and things on the internet, belittle me, talk about me behind my back and ignore me. I was feeling a state od despair not knowing what to do, so I googled this for some help.. Inside my head I want to say things back to her, but that would make me as bad as her, so i've kept quiet and have tried to be nice to her. I am a sensitive person and have taken all this personally. I think if I stick up for myself it would make it worse. It is just so hard when I have to live with this girl.(As she lives in my halls) and i've always got on with most people. I'm just finding it really hard and it's dragging me down. I don't know what to do, as acting nice hasn't solved anything.

sticking up for yourself would not make this worse, it sounds bad already, her behavior
is anti-social and inappropriate, born out of jealousy or envy perhaps or a powertrip.
Targeting and bullying another gives some people a high, just as doing a kindness for
someone makes other people feel good. quiet, well-mannered, even-keeled people
are often targeted by people who are unhappy inside themselves.
Do you know The Secret?
quiet your mind, ask for peace and harmony in your daily life, believe that it will
happen for you and imagine that it has happened, that your life has become one of
positive and happy interactions with all who surround you. And practice this. Learning
to still your mind this way is not easy for young people on the go, I could not do it at your
age but would have greatly benefited by meditating. I thought back then meditation
was concentration on a thought or thoughts and was truly surprised to find that it is about
emtying the mind of thought, bringing your mind to a beautiful stillness and peace. I
learned to do that with Thick Nhat Hahn on one of his Mindfullness CD's. It all begins with
concentration on breathing --this is my inbreath, this is my outbreath. etc. etc.
do you think you could say to the bully I want you to stop your inappropriate behaviors
towards me, it's unprovoked and I'm tired of it. ?

I think it's worth noting a few things the Bible says about why people are so mean to each other, and why people are the way they are: "The Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually" (Genesis 6:5). Jesus also says that people love the darkness because their works were evil. It's the effects of sin and a fallen world; it has warped and distorted us and we have succumbed to it. That's why we need a Savior, and that's why Jesus Christ came to live the life we should've lived. He was PERFECT, yet people hated him and killed him. Just goes to show you the depth of human depravity. Yet when we give our lives to Christ, he completely transforms us.

Whew! Thank you for that revelation. I have have been talked to badly, and even cursed at. Then that anger build up inside me and I take it out on someone else. I felt ssooo bad of myself. I hated myself, and now I wished I can apologize to that person so bad. I even had to ask God for forgiveness for that. I hope I get better at this next time someone else wants to treat me like dirt.

I dont understand why "when people face a problem in their life or have a bad day, why, they believe they can justify their bad day or bad experience, with, being mean and/or distant towards other people". We all have had days when many things went wrong and I don't know anyone who hasn't faced some type of life or relationship crisis or big let-down at some point and time during their life" . To then justify a bad experience through, treating others bad, or ignoring people purposely and leaving them left to feel as though they are viewed by someone as a disease or as though they don't belong, is wrong and certainly doesn't make anyone's bad day or crisis feel any better". So I guess the confussion and mean or distant attitude that a good portion of our society has towards others, creates or leaves many of us nice/kind people with many unanswered questions. (1) Do I want to be friends or in a relationship with someone who treats others bad, because they are having a bad day or faced a crisis???? (2) Why do the nice and kind people tend to be the people who take the brunt of mean or immature peoples, bad days or life crisis???? (3) I'm sure many would agree, it certainly causes the nice person to begin to question and/or doubt their own first impression of others????
By nature or maybe it was the way my parents brought me up, "in a very Catholic family, I received all the sacraments, went to church every week, etc" I believe it is right and should be everyone elses behavior, (to treat others the way, you would like to be treated) ....and as for the mean and snobby people who behave opposite of me, I've learned it is far better to stay away and/or not trying to communicate or be friends or involved with mean/snobby people, let them hurt other people, and it keeps me in a position in life, where I/you, won't have to stoop to their level of mean and/or snobbish behavior. It's similar to freedom, being independent, (by way of one's personality, your own personality), i.e; I don't choose nor will I allow myself to be forced to behave as they do (mean or snobbish to others).
As for relationships, through my own experiences hands-on and reading several good psychology books related to men's behavior toward woman, men becoming distant and/or mean towards a woman or their lover, behavior such I as described above, towards someone they say they love or had once been in love with, psychologists say.... it is the result of how a man (tests to a woman's love and/or personality). Although, psychologists also note much of this behavior is done by men who were looking for attention and/or who may need more attention than they are currently receiving from the woman or people they love. One book notes, that when men realize that, one who tests and/or doesn't trust one's love, usually ends up "losing it". Hence, why they reach out to a counselor or psychologist for behavior guidance and/or dealing with depression. Another book/psychologist noted, those who do not have a succesful outcome thru counseling and continue to treat the people they love mean and distant, at some point return for treatment, because they realized (one WANT MORE, of what they can't or DON'T HAVE". Obviously, it sums up that a wise man or a wise person, should treat other people with respect and be nice/kind people, (NOT MEAN and/or SNOBBY) if they want friends or a relationship and/or expect respect and love in return.

I agree so much with this article. People are so mean these days and it is because they are miserable and hurt. I don't remember it always being this way but people have definetly gotten meaner. The building I am living in his horrible. I have never seen such meaness or stupditity in all of my life. I have been hurt incredibly in life and am not a mean person at all. People have no problem being mean to me and I dont do anything to anyone. Its so bad that I dont leave my apartment and when I do I never know who I am going to encounter. Just one selfish asshole after the other complaining and bitching non stop. Now I cannot stand this as I already suffer from depression. I have become even sicker . I am afraid to talk to most of the people in this building because they always have some negative comment to make or some criticisim of what your doing. Everybody says that the right thing to do is to just let it roll off of your back and ignore it. Even this stupid fat asshole in the wheelchair who complains endlessly to me and then the minute I try to say something to me he rolls away. There are so many people like that in this building. If you are a person who is mean and petty and immature then you fit in just fine in this building. I have lived here for three years and I have gotten worse and worse. I should not have to live like this it is horrible. I dont know what I am going to. I am trapped here. I have got to find a way to take care of myself and start getting assertive with people. I am not going to stand around listening to peoples negativity and non stop complaints anymore. Why should I have to. I have enough of my own problems. I used to be one of the most active people in this building always on the go but always had extreme anxiety every time I stepped outside of my apartment door due to the fact that I dont know who is going to yell at me next. I have yelled back at people but I hate confrontation. I could be dying in the parking lot and nobody would care. I cant live like this. I have went from being a nice person to being a scared jaded person who hates people. I do not want to be this way but I despise most of the people in my building for good reason. They are the most miserable people I have ever met on the face of the earth. My spirit has been broken at the amount of shit I have gotten from people in this building and the stupidness that goes on in here. I dont think I am going to survive another day in this place. I am not working right now. The work place is often just as mean or nastier. Does anyone have any advice on how a person who is extremely sensitive with severe depression can handle people like this. I just tend to clam up. Letting things go is not good for me. I have been the one to suffer. I have been yelled at by the landlord enough that I dont ask for anything because she scares me. There are very few people in this building that would be willing to help me and it would probably be a huge deal if I asked them to. I am either going to have to start putting people in there place or just wearing earphones. Despite this negative horrible environment and my severe horrible depression I have to be able to muster up the strength to teach swimming lessons to children and be happy. My one friend in the building is living in la la land and pretending that the building is not a bad place. But it is a pathetic place. She has the ability to be fake and she doesnt expect much out of life and does very little with her life. I want to be living my life and that means learning how to deal with nasty people and letting it go does not work for me and neither does killing people with kindness work for me either. I dont have it in me.
Anyone who has any advice on what I can say to these people when they start there bitching because I dont want anything to do with people who are constantly negative and only think of themselves.

Why didn't you ask him to move? Jeez. Maybe he was caught up in his own thing, maybe he lost all of his money or his best friend died, or he is so caught up in his issues he didn't notice you. Open your mouth and say, would you mind moving your car? I'm a bit stuck here.
That way, you're not being a passive victim, questioning the motivation of everyone around you, you easily get out of the way, and you don't assume that people are out to get you and are cold and callous just because they can't anticipate your needs. Maybe, had he not been absorbed in his own thing, thoughts, day, whatever, he might have made the connection that your struggle could have been alleviated by his help. Some people are spacey, out there, oblivious. It doesn't make them "mean". Lighten up, ask for what you need, no need to be pushy, just simply, politely ask and assume that people do want to help you and are nice, and they just might be.

I was sort of thinking the same thing. I find a lot of people here complaining about others might need a mirror.

Now what I see here is the both of you trolling. Get your act together and quit venting on this site for justification!

Wow. such time wasters we have here.. =D

I've also grown weary of these negative, mean spirit and self-centered people. I've done some self-searching myself, and the thing is I don't treat people horribly even on a bad day. I understand we should act cool and try not to be affected by them; however, we are made of flesh and do we ever get a break from them? No. I've also begun to wonder if I am the one who's being too judgmental/sensitive and why I cannot carry on just like the others. Knowing that I don't act like these people doesn't necessarily make things better inside my head, I'm just tired of sucking it in!

Dear K.T. & Readers, You could not of said it better. I had such a bad day at work yesterday. do to rude co-worker. It seems That I Get No Break. I come home felling crappy all the time. I've tried being so nice. the girls find so many trivial ways to be mean, It seems that they spend so much energy to be mean that the barely can do there work. I talked to a proffessonal about it. Just to have some one to listen to was nice.Her best advice was,"Don't try to act the way they do". I told her I don't think I could. It is against all my nature. But I am tired of sucking it in Too!

I think people aren't mean like you think. It is just the way they act or the way you look at them. Like me I can be a good person with my friend but with a stranger they mind think i'm mean.

People are so mean these days They pretend 2 b your friend. then bull e u most of it is in Florida. I like NY better it is not mean!!!!!! From a 10 and 3 quartered girl

In the 1990's, everyone was nice and polite. but now people are acting like a brat. We are having war now, why be mean anyway. George W. bush was mean and most people hated him

We are having a war. Mrs. Ortiz who is 10 years old and goes to Ventura Elemantary school on 275 waters edge Kissimmee , Florida 34743 better watch out when we go to 5th grade

God told us to love and care. but why aren't people doing that?

Yosiris Ortiz leave me alone.

It's been six months today since I have been to this website. Honestly, things have not changed much. Most people ARE STILL mean. However, my response(s) and my outlook to their behavior has changed. I just know that this is Satan's world. There is a spiritual battle taking place. I firmly believe those who are kind-hearted are just being attacked by people who are under Satan's control. My advice to EVERYONE on here is DO NOT respond back to the meanies and bullies; they just want a response. If you do respond, do it in the most mature way you can.
It's funny; I ran into Ben Kelchner who frequently mocked me (not Kletchner) and he's still a jerk. As posted by others on this site, We just have to stay nice. To Thinker, JChang820, chutney, cj, kj, KT, julie, Judi, Amber, Lynn, Dan, Mariam, Mall Employee, Dee, Hearmenow, Meanie, Iamabot, fritz, Akee, Lena, Sandra D, Nice Guy, Lyssie, Not a Bot, Brent, Joshua, Ren, Rose, Rob, Jenny, Chance, James Johnston, Ada, Hilda, Sebastien Meeser, Nathaniel, Skywatcher3...ALL those who have posted and to ALL those who will post comments in the future, my message is JUST STAY NICE AND HANG IN THERE. The battle is not yours but God's. :)

It's nothing to do with being hurt, most people are just selfish and inconsiderate. Western societies are suffering from a culture of 'me first' and 'I want', people want everything without having to try. An example? Inconsiderate driving, due to the fact that most people consider themselves to be VIPs who have no time to give way or wait a few seconds. Western society is based around greed and this sickening trend will continue until the whole world is populated with people like this.

i work in a doctors office and over the last two years people have been getting really nasty from collecting their copays to even asking them to reschedule if their 20 mins late(my doctor is rare and runs exactly on time) these patients know him and especially the older ones they know the drill they know their contract but NOW with these economically hard times its worse. we are all stuck in this depression and why take it out on nurses who help.! but i truely think that it all stems from financial strains in their life. as some say money makes the world go round and i think with that said we have to keep fighthing the fight as they say and find the true beauty in people because by the end of the day thats what God wants. every ugly attitude you encounter try to find the smile in that person and pray for them. because our next life is for eternity.

In the last thousand of years, man worked hard to create a functioning, working society. This new millennium brought about a change; the turning point. Man doesn't care anymore, he's had enough and now he wants to destroy it all and throw it all away. Personally, I believe it's all over, humanity is on a downward spiral towards extinction and anyone who disagrees are lying to themselves!

...8 years ago I was fired from the last full time job I ever had under false allegations and my best friend deserted me when I needed his support. This has resulted in me not being able to move out from under my parents' shadow.

I too was fired from a job (about 7 years ago) and was accused of doing something I did not do. They threated to destroy my husband, son, and myself with bad publicity, which sent me into a year of horrible depression and anxiety. The people (former friends) that knew me well enough to know that I would never do what I was accused of NEVER stood up for me and threw me under the bus. The company never had any proof and eventually let it go... no charges ever filed. I was tramatized and can honestly say I am not the same person that I was back then. I will never be mean to people because of what I went through... but it is sad that some people were easily able to be that cruel to me and my family.

I think that meanness is a form of laziness. It's often easier to look on the negative side of things and be judgmental of people, and be brutally honest rather than polite (especially on the Internet). And, as in your case, some people are just too lazy to do anything considerate for those around them.

Just my two cents.

I lived with a hateful mean person for over 30 years, and the truth is THEIR BRAIN IS NOT DEVELOPED ENOUGH TO THINK ANY DIFFERENT, honestly I'm not just saying this it is the truth. They never understand or see what you are saying or understand kindness, they just have totally non-understanding brains, and they really cannot fix it.Other brains are more intelligent and have a better capacity to think and ect. It is not their fault.

i looked this subject up on google after every thing got to much for me and up popped this article which has helped put a smile back on my face and especially after reading all the comments which have showed me that there is nice people out there. I have had a lot of people hate on me because i am positive and nice. I try not to let these people get to me usually as you find they are usually jealous and wish they could be nice so keep being the better person and smile and thank the lord we are not the sad grumpy ones :)

It isn't always the ones demonized by press and society- as a whole, who are mean. What I have noticed in my travels through life, is that folks who are used to getting what they want and who have little respect for the rights and feelings of others, tend to be the most unkind- surprisingly, they seldom notice how their words and deeds affect others. I do not believe that the "bad" guys are the real mean people- some of them can be- toward certain people, in certain situations, but societies "wounded" have been so badly treated by others, that they have lost their capacity to feel empathy. Unlike your average, everyday, pampered snob; who tends to treat others as some "means to an end." They treat people badly as a matter of daily living and seldom notice that they do it. But no one ever says that this daily form of snobbery and arrogance is just MEAN! No- they judge the "bad" guy on t.v. or press- the poor slob who just finally flipped out one day and snapped. It's quite possible that he or she just got fed up w/ being treated like garbage by the REAL mean people- the one's that aren't even held accountable for their nasty nature. Maybe because we tend to accept snobbery and arrogance- when it comes from someone we respect/like/are attracted to etc. People, in general, are far too self consumed to care about much of anything, anymore!

The people that I have met that were truly mean - -the Ragsdales, Clinks, Smiths, Stubbs, Watkins and Knochels of Dallas, TX. When I think back on my life, these are the names that will forever make me sad. And yet, in every single one of them, there was a person who wanted to be the boss/superior/better than everyone. And what is really sad is I took care of their children while they worked in the healthcare industry. Other teachers may have talked more than me, and engaged in all the blah blah blah of the day, but I was actually the one "DOING." Some people like to talk alot, and some of us actually work, so we don't feel the need to shower you with conversation on a daily basis. If the list of names seems long, please understand that I was in this childcare field a long time/TOO LONG before working for the Government. No more work for me!! (hahahah) I loved working with children, but would NEVER do it again. There were SO MANY nice people along the way, but it's easier to remember the mean ones. I wish this wasn't so. I with the nicer ones were easier to remember. Then, I had to watch it because I started turning mean. I wish the nice memories could outweigh the bad. I actually started getting mean. There were so many nice parent as well, and I am working on focusing more on the people who are/were nice to me, and less on the people who are mean.. WHY DO MEAN PEOLE LEAVE SUCH DEEP SCARS? WHY IS IT EASIER TO REMEMBER THE BAD THINGS?????
WHY DOES IT MAKE US START BEING MEAN????
LASTLY, WHY DO WE SPEND SO MUCH TIME AND ENERGY TRYING TO PLEASE PEOPLE INTO LIKING US?? And, with many of the names I mentioned, we had something in common. I came from a family of alcoholics and so did some of the mean people. But, it didn't make us any more understanding of one another - - WHY IS THIS? SHORT ANSWER: PEOPLE ARE MEAN TO FEEL BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE. TO FEEL BIG/GOD-LIKE. Or could it be that they see something in us wee little seed-people they wish they had, so they feel the need to step on us. And if the opposite is true, and there is nothing great about us, leave us alone for Gods sake.

The people that I have met that were truly mean - -the Ragsdales, Clinks, Smiths, Stubbs, Watkins and Knochels of Dallas, TX. When I think back on my life, these are the names that will forever make me sad. And yet, in every single one of them, there was a person who wanted to be the boss/superior/better than everyone. And what is really sad is I took care of their children while they worked. If the list of names seems long, please understand that I was in this childcare field a long time/TOO LONG before working for the Government. I loved working with children, but would NEVER do it again. There were many nice people along the way, but it's easier to remember the mean ones. I wish this wasn't so. I wish the nice memories could outweigh the bad. I did have many nice parent as well, and I am working on focusing more on the people who are nice to me, and less on the people who are mean.. WHY DO MEAN PEOLE LEAVE SUCH DEEP SCARS? WHY IS IT EASIER TO REMEMBER THE BAD THINGS????? And, with many of the names I mentioned, we had something in common. I came from a family of alcoholics and so did some of the mean people. But, it didn't make us any more understanding of one another - - WHY IS THIS? SHORT ANSWER: TO FEEL BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE. TO FEEL BIG/GOD-LIKE.
Thank you to frustration's comment - that comment helped me today more than you know

Maybe the silent smoker was quietly in his own mind, battling the same deep depression I deal with every day. You lived...you'll be fine, and then you'll die. Plus your car is ok! Not a scratch, because scratches on cars are so important....

Lol About the car story. . .The same thing happened to me! I was picking up medicine for my daughted who had the chicken pocks and while I returned I found this lady inside her sedan parked right infront of my car. I calmly walked into my car, got in, and waited for the lady to presumably move. . .yet she didn't, IN FACT by the review mirror I could see she was laughing that I was trapped so. . . I reversed quickly and broke hard inches away from her car, startling her, and then I yelled to her "Move Your Car B^tch Or I'll Ram Your Piece Of Shit!". Fortunately, she did and I was able to move out. Just gave someone a taste of their own medicine. ;)

Your right ive noticed over the years that people on a hole are becoming more mean. Its strange and i dont know how to explaine but they will try to start on you for the smallest thing its like your and no one wonts to talk anymore or even stand next to each other there is more but it would take to long to type.

I agree totally; society is one mean group of people! I always have to remind myself that it's not me, but it's them. I've worked in a hospital for over 13 years and found out that the rudest are doctor's; young upcoming doctor's. Why? I'M NOT SURE. I'll find few and far between when it comes to saying hello or smiling during so.

without mean people their wouldnt be nice people... i mean you can find nice people in the world, but there are certain places where people are ruder than other places...(orange county)

Mean people are mean because they can be. Once again, I found that saying something back to a mean person is a waste of time. If they were a thoughtful person, they would not be mean in the first place. We just have to remember that when mean people bother us, it is because we are thoughtful.

I've had that feeling In my life for many years. But help,crying happiness there are people that I don`t like some are nice not everyone is.

Thank goodness for this article. I was feeling especially exasperated with the ongoing mean behaviors of most people I have encountered in life, and was feeling especially overwhelmed today. I asked a stranger once, this same question, “why are people so mean”, and their insightful answer was “because they are miserable.” Which I would guess most would agree is true, but I think there is more. Meanness is a form of selfishness, and a cop-out for creativity, gratitude, and the energy it takes to be kind. The habit of kindness is like jogging around the block, it can be hard, sometimes it's downright painful, but almost always, one benefits in the long run from the habit. The other thing is, great people, truly righteous people are never mean. I hope I am not the only person that has noticed that. I have been astounded at the behavior of some people I have encountered in my life, who have made calculated phone calls, for the sole purpose of hurting me and/or my family, and these are the same people who brag about how important or great or righteous that they are, and put on a show of kindness, like a theater performance, at the same time belittling any person that they feel the need to hurt. Great people, make other's feel great. Miserable people, make others feel miserable. End of story.

well put I agree

Thanks for sharing - you are so insightful! It's almost christmas and yesterday my younger brother by 10 years and I went to place wreaths at our parents graves - Before we left he managed to bring up a story about me with a nasty remark - I said nothing but wondered how he could pass judgement on something when he was 6 and I was 16 and he had none of the facts in hand - It made me very sad to think he has so much hatred and bitterness in his heart that he's been hating me for the 56 years of his life when I have done nothing but support his family and children and been by his side in his times of illness - Yes I know he's a bully and I forgive him - he is after all my baby brother - my mantra for those unkind people is "Let Go and Let God deal with them" When I feel hurt it's mostly my ego rebelling against the nasty comments - When I erase the need to explain and leave it to the Lord to deal with I feel more at peace -

We all have some burdens in life but its how we deal with them that makes our characters.

I know where you all are coming from. I have found one way to get some relief from the mean people at work. when this one person makes a sarcastic remark to me trying to embarriss (sp) me in front of people I act like I don't get the scarcasm and that she is telling me about something I did out of the goodness of her heart cause she likes me so much ie.." Why thank you for reminding me about that and keeping me out of trouble I appreciate your kindness and concern" then get out of there before she can respond. I know it gets her goat cause she can't stand for me or others to think that she actually likes me LOL It's almost fun.

I'm not that old, and when I'm at school, all students speak of is criticizng others. Some kids even say they love hurting others and starting fights. I personally don't think I'm nice, though my friends and fellow students think I'm the nicest person they ever met. At home, I've ALWAYS been mean to my little brother, but more like picking on him. I don't know how to stop though because I promised myself in the past to, and it never worked out. I just want to be a nicer person.

Hi EN, that makes me sad to hear about the school kids liking to hurt anothers feelings. my daughter is 14 so it hits home. You must be pretty nice to even be on this site. I think its natrual to pick on your brother but maybe you could make a game out of being nice to him. Do nice stuff for him maybe even with out him knowing and see if it doesn't make you feel pretty good when you see his reaction to your kindness. after awhile you might find that it is even more fun to be nice than mean. just a suggestion what do you think?

i think people should not smoke or be mean , you should not hit other people , be nice not mean / mr. martin luther king jr always said be nice

my friend anna is so mean she makes me cry and she says everything is my fult and she does not play fair and she says its always my fult

people are so sick....even after they've abused you and you've been through hell-- they still manage to torment you for fun. My parents have stolen 10,000 from me, put me in debt with the govt 12k...ruined my life in many ways....im not frustrated ive suffered horribly---in so many ways by many people....and for it i get a sh*tty mean sister in law sitting there drilling me while we're out to dinner, insulting me while my mean sick mother is sitting there egging her on---they've drained all my good...and they still want to take more....and torment me more-- u think....these psychopaths stop when they've drained you compeltely but they just keep going...everyone these days defends abusers---they are evil backwards sick...i think evil has taken over people these days....95% of people are mean sick in the head and will do evil to others...its a horrible society with awful people....this place is a nightmare...

I think the reason that some (probably most) people are mean is that they are low-functioning and therefore don't have a conscience, and don't think or empathize very well.

The best way to deal with mean people is to avoid them. Shun them. Form exclusive groups and only let nice people in.

Being nice to mean people will only reinforce that it is ok to be that way, and it is not. The "turn the other check method" just doesn’t a yield positive result with mean people because they are so low-functioning that they won't even appreciate the kindness or forgiveness that is shown to them. They don't even realize that the nice people are actually the strongest people. Essentially, I say ditch the "kill them with kindness" model that society seems to have used in the past. This does not arouse the conscience of an extremely low-functioning mean individual because they don't even have a conscience. Instead, it is better to avoid them at all costs.

Trying to get along with mean people is a waste of time. They may be prevalent in numbers, but they are weak, and associating with them is surely not worth any descent person’s time. It is better to save your kindness for the few kind people who actually deserve it.

I think the reason that some (probably most) people are mean is that they are low-functioning and therefore don't have a conscience, and don't think or empathize very well.
The best way to deal with mean people is to avoid them. Shun them. Form exclusive groups and only let nice people in.
Being nice to mean people will only reinforce that it is ok to be that way, and it is not. The "turn the other check method" just doesn’t a yield positive result with mean people because they are so low-functioning that they won't even appreciate the kindness or forgiveness that is shown to them. They don't even realize that the nice people are actually the strongest people. Essentially, I say ditch the "kill them with kindness" model that society seems to have used in the past. This does not arouse the conscience of an extremely low-functioning mean individual because they don't even have a conscience. Instead, it is better to avoid them at all costs.
Trying to get along with mean people is a waste of time. They may be prevalent in numbers, but they are weak, and associating with them is surely not worth any descent person’s time. It is better to save your kindness for the few kind people who actually deserve it.

We have had so many family and friends treat us with disrespect. I guess when they don;t get their way they are rude and stay that way. We are nice people and don;t deserve this hate. What has it done for us ? We have decided to never make new friends again . We also are done with the family members that have treated us so clearly pooly forever. No more invites or so called caring of these people. We have decided to stay with our now family and leave everyone behind ! We can live in peace with us and love us and be happy. To hell with everyone and their vindictive grudges cause we are gone.

Me and my husband are amazed at the level of meanness and jealousy of our relatives and friends, (strangers

I have been hurt too, everyone has sometime in their lives been hurt, but I do not take it out on everyone around me. This is awful they way people treat each other anymore, whether it is face to face, behind their backs, in a car...it doesn't matter. I don't understand why they don't get if they are NICE it would be so much better on themselves and everyone around them, I am beginning to think they like it.

I agree however laws of human nature give the other person a way to survive as well. Being kind and compassion is the best way out for me. areas of my life are survival kits to get through the day.

I also agree with many of the posters. I think that some people are so deeply wounded, so hurt that they feel like they need to be mean to others, and in their mind their behavior is justified. Another reason could be there upbringing, but I find that usually these people have had a rough life or upbringing. When this happens to me, I find other people to talk to and try to surround myself with supportive and understanding friends. Sometimes a hug of the opposite sex or spouse is all you need. Peace and love.

Also remember that there are many out there who have it way worse than us, and in the past many have been burned at the stake just for being who they are.

Hi Adina:

Thank YOU for addressing this silent issue. It's seems to be rampant here in Chicago yet no one seems to want to address it! What is so... sad to me is the young folks out there who don't seem to care how they address others in public. What has become of our society? You know, although I believe our parents are our main influence with regard to how we treat one another, I also believe our workplace and educational environments are also somehow responsible for this influence and teaching. Unfortunately, corporations today do NOT want to invest the money necessary to train employees, specifically, how to treat their clients/customers. From what I can gather, if an indivual is not taught the principles of 'basic human respect' in the home environment, and it is not available in the workplace or educational environment, where is it taught? Sadly, the negative influence of television these days doesn't help either. The current reality (cheap network) TV is quite ugly theses days and lacking in human dignity. All I can say is... the best we can do is to continue... to teach our children, friends and family to abide by the Golden Rule! Do unto others as you would do unto them! Honestly, what else can we possibly do when the world seems to be working against us!

Cheers to YOU!
Eileen

I have become so numb by the pain that mean people have caused me I have stopped feeling joy; that was their intention. Someone help me.

Yes,people are hurting no daught about that.We get frustrated,scared and do not know what to do at times.We feel the challenge and we don`t like it.We get angry and become nasty.I know quite few people like that.It is not nice but we live in a wicked and material world which I hate.

You live ONCE! Make the best out of everything you can possible! :D

I'm not sure why everyone is so mean but I'm starting to feel just like them. I didn't want to be but I am tired of being the one who is friendly and ignored. I am at a point where I don't want to speak first to anyone these days..Is anyone else feeling this way?

I feel the same. I'm nice in the corporate world and I feel it is to my disadvantage. They think they can do anything they want and you will not retaliate because you are nice. There is also one thing why i think people are mean in the corporate world, it's because you don't kiss their _sses.

It has been good for me to hear someone else feel the same way as I do. I feel very alone right now w/these feelings - as it seems everyone is so deceitful and mean. (Long story right now - but its really hit home recently)

To use the excuse that "these" people are wounded is even more sickening. I too have been deeply wounded throughout my life and it has only mad me work harder to NOT be a person who wounds others indiscriminately!

To excuse it at "Thinker" does - human nature and survival...I'm a biologist. That is simply NOT true! Animals are NOT "mean." They most often work cooperatively w/each other. The killing for food is sad - but NOT mean. The males can be cruel in some species, or at some times, but most of the time if you really watch - you will see love (YES LOVE) and compassion!

People are mean because humans can be very selfish and self-serving. If we used just part of our so-called intelligence to work toward promoting goodness r/t hurting others to make ourselves feel better - this would be a much better world...

this is true i guess, i mean people can be really rude sometimes. maybe they don't know that they're being mean, or what? but what I've learned is that what goes around comes around. i don't know why this happens. maybe it's god or something, but it's true. just stop to look around at life and you'll realize that basically everything happens for a reason. anyways, peace out!

Mean people are always stupid and ugly to girls. Mean boys don't like nice girls and that's why I don't like myself. When they start getting mean, they don't play.

Reality TV and things of this sort makesit more fashionable to mean spirited to people these days.

I have learned to be my own best allie and it works. I know use my instinct and judgement about people and their motive...because just about everyone has one these days.

A few select friends is better than a whole bunch of shallow blood suckers!

Thank you for your great editorial. It's great to finally find an article describing the evil, mean attitude of people nowadays, without any further religious overtones. I have also noticed that people is getting more evil, mean, sarcastic, aggressive every passing day. Every new generation is becoming meaner. If we look at the past, in the 70's and 80's there was still kindness, especially in smaller cities. As populations grow and competition is promoted, the dog-eat-dog mentality becomes paramount.

While it may be true that the source of evil, mean attitudes is due to being hurt, it's the approach to it that creates callousness. Therefore, people start behaving like being evil is "cool", or with anarchic/I-don't-f#$@ing-care attitudes. The plastic media adds to the bad attitudes because it actually cheers when a celebrity behaves bad, creating a pattern for imitation. Also because most old good-behaving manners are being destroyed and bad ones cheered, there's no wonder people is more evil these days.

i understood it, but still people want success in life, and it is very expensive if you try to be kind and nice with others as they are very good at taking advantage of others being kind, and unfortunately people assess that the so called kind person did,t realize that
he possed some valubale asstes with that he needs protect well. And the selifsh will begin fishing benifits from him. Finally he will become a lauging stuff.

I've been bullied all through elementary school. I have been put down by my parents and my teachers. I have never had anyone encourage me or help me in any way. So basically I have been surrounded by mean people all my life. I am a successful business women with a husband and 2 wonderful childern. I deal with very mean people everyday. It's almost like they are hoping that they have the opportunity to say something nasty, offensive, or just plain mean. I smile and pat them on the shoulder and give them some words of encouragment. Because I figure that these people are miserable people and they want everyone else to be miserable too. But I decided that I did not want to grow up like those people around me. I wanted to be the hero, the mentor, the nice guy! I encourage all of you that run into miserable people, try and smile at them and tell them that you know they have it in them to be nice too. They usually apologize and feel really bad. Or they go home and don't sleep at night because it's like you dropped a pile of hot coals on their head. Either way you win...

Sometimes people become mean because they get very jealous specially women toward other women. I've had a really hard time to find good female friends and not to get back stabbed. Every time my life is good they become mean and turn against me.
I agree that some people who have been hurt a lot they may hate the whole world. However, I've seen some people who have never been hurt and they got every thing going for them and they are selfish and mean more than any one else! I don't know if genetic has any role on people's character.

i think people are mean sometimes because yes they are hurt, and try as they might, the situation doesn't get resolve, especially in a relationship where adult children are involved. the adult children need to recognize that their father needs time with his partner, and move out and start their own lives, is it not stressing to support a 30 year daughter who doesn't pay any bills and is on drugs

That is An absolutely true stAtement.we're all injured in some way, but I am the only one who can make me miserable, no one else. Attitude is everything!

It's because being mean makes a spectacle of power demanding respect by fear and being nice is like calling to be taken advantage of. - the nice lamb gets eaten, the bad wolf gets dinner!
Blame Darwin and his "survival of the fittest stupid human backstabber assohole!"

yeah that s right now a day s people are so mean meaner than me

well that opinion is very interesting ive been trying to figure out the same thing i agree that people who are mean really are hurt at some point of their lives and they try to hide that with being mean they are just overprotective and dont want to risk getting hurt again and thats why theyr not friendly thats my opinion (:

No, (with respect to your opinion), I've met some pretty nasty people, they are emotionally disabled, meaning incapable of any feeling or empathy towards fellow human beings. No one hurt them, that is the problem, so they think it's ok, to go around hurting and destroying everyone and anyone, cause they can't feel any pain or anything whatsoever. The only pain they feel is of not getting what they want, when they want! they don't understand the pain they cause others until they get it to feel the exact same way and intensity on themselves... that is if they ever will. The Holocaust is an evidence of what I'm saying...

Thanks. I get sick of mean people, their ultimatums, group attacks and laughter in my face.

I too have been mistreated all of my life by family (mother,and sibblings), school bullies, in relationships with female friends and marriage. I cannot buy into the I am hurt so I hurt others simply because I was always hurt and I am still nice to everyone no matter how I am treated. I truly believe that vengence is the Lords and I will not let anyone take me out of my character. I use to bend over backwards to try to make people like me but then I realized that I cannot make other peoples problems or issues become mine. I am still going to be me because I like who I am, a genuinely nice person. I am so greatful for this web page I stumbled across it one day when I typed in why are people so mean and I was so surprised to see that there are people just like me with simular issues. Reading everyones blogs and seeing how others deal with their pain is kind of neat and has even helped me. So to all of you nice people out there just keep on keeping on life is too short to be bitter and angry all of the time its not worth it and stay away from negative, mean and unhappy people. Remember misery loves company. God is love, happiness, peace and joy he does not want us to be doormats he wants the best for us. Sometimes you have to go to the movies by yourself, lunch, borders bookstore, to the park and sit by the water, write some poetry, draw or whatever makes you happy and try to enjoy each day to the fullest. And always remember nobody can make you unhappy unless YOU LET THEM! SO DONT LET THEM AND YOU WIN. GOD BLESS.

Yeah I think people are nastier in this time in history. The way I see it, is that most of the men I know are unemployed, underemployed, or being bullied out of the workplace by their bosses that are now females. All the females I know have jobs, good jobs, and they got them easily just for being female, and their jobs are higher paying then men that can barely even get any kind of work at all to save their damaged lives.

That creates an imbalance different then any time before, because the females are not taking on any "stay at home husbands" how men used to support wives - its just not happening. And most men today are better cooks and can actually do domestic chores better then females, but, Mr. Mom is just never going to happen. The government is their new family support structure, and men are discusting, worthless, pathetic, distrustworthy, rapists who should all be murdered, set up, prosecuted, and then jailed. They need to be hurt, and punished, and murdered for being men. Especially heterosexual ones because all they are is abusive and discusting and hated.

So, the men are going to either be murdered by women or the governement, or definately be homeless and die because of their worthlessness, and the women will just be miserable and pathetic, and be selfish enough to satisify their biological clocks and raise empty, angry, confused, fatherless children who are alone, vulnerable, sad, and making the humans nastier and nastier, less satisfied, more stressed, living in poverty, and generally just pathetic and stupid losers. The last the women should do is think to be ashamed of upsetting the balance, taking advantage, and tromping on men the way they have, but they never will be because they are self-center, toxic, and avoidant of responsibility, easily manipulated and to the death of our race do we part.

However, the women today are Independent now, so that's all that ever mattered.

Husband's sister and husband........oh what a joy. She has alienated everyone on his side of the family. He has changed so much since being married to her. She has alienated her own brother as well.I honestly think misery does love company and their they are! Two miserable people stuck in a marriage they are not happy with. We have tried reaching out but was turned away several times. I can control them only myself and feel sad that they seem to be angry at everyone else, not looking at the issues in their own home. Some couples just feel stuck, finances are above the roof and some just like to be mean. I live for today and honestly try and treat others as I wish to be treated. You get further with niceness then you do poopy, unless you are trying to attract flies. Life is truly too short to be miserable and mean to others.

I am in total agreement with this story. In fact I am so tired of mean people I would just as soon go no where ever. Nor make phone calls. The world today is nothing like it was when I was younger and I am only 53.
Businesses are exceptionally mean and on top of their incompetence this is just unbelievable to me. The one thing I am learning however, as of late since becoming more right with God is to ask for what I want nicely; in other words that driver that was impairing your movement would have been politely asked to back up by me.
Usually they notice their selfishness and apologize. This is not however, guaranteed. If they have too much entitlement they may cuss you out for even requesting their attention.

If you know someone that I call always "steals your thunder", negative, nothing ever good to say about anyone, life is just about them, jealous and vindictive. Read on toxic people. This is alot the world is these days. Filled with people who are toxic and do not consider other's feeling ever. It is the way the majority of the world is these days I can remember a time when people were more considerate of other's and still holding doors open for people, saying thank you or have a nice day. There are still the few of us out there that try and be the better person and sometimes feel....why bother? Don't let a few people stop you from being who you are. You will be the one that shines in a crowd and let other's know that the world isn't all bad. There are still a few kind people out there.

Amen to that and hope people realize that they are not perfect either, and to just treat people the way they want to be treated.

This article could be me ! In fact it is me. When I was a little girl my Dad was mean alot. Why because after 60 years I turned out mean just like him. And now I am doing the same thing to my husband and now my grown children. My life at 60 feels like it is over, because even though I love my family and I did a good job I feel selfish because my life did not turn out perfect and what is perfect ? The fact that I do not have more but I have my health and family so I just need to get over it

I dont know why people are mean. I just feel pity for the evil people of this world, and find solace in the fact that all I can do is trust in the LORD to make me a better person, and hope that vile people will eventually come around

This is really excellent analysis. I had a very sad experience of such a mean behaviour by a well educated (?) person. He was introduced to me in a meeting on education. After a while, he asked me about my basic pay, my travel allowance, my gross salary, etc. I was polite by saying I don't remember, instead of telling him I don't answer personal questions. I wondered how an university education person can be so cheap.

I have absolutely no idea why people are mean. Some people just have lousey dispositions, some folks may have grown up in a household with other mean people, some people say and do mean things out of sheer ignorance and those who are intentionally mean are just evil. God bless the good-natured, kind, tolerant souls of this earth. The give the rest of us hope.

thank you

Its true but in school and other places it gose to far and it wont stop not even if they are completey happy

oosome by a 5th grader (means u are so right and awesome!)

Great question, I always try to be respectful, considerate and help whenever I can but it doesn't always stop the people that you showed empathy to come right up and smack you in the face. Am I wasting my time to spend hours wondering why?

it is the women that are usually mean, with their no good attitude today. as a straight man that wants very much to meet a good woman for me, it has become impossible. they have really changed over the years, then again many of them are brain dead anyway. trying to start a intelligent conversation with them, is a losing battle now because of the way they represent themselves. they are just no good pigs today.

Hmm, what a mean thing to say, not to mention a huge generalisation, all women are pigs? Shame on you!

Sounds like the person who wrote the article does not know the meaning of the word mean. Mean is being in a high school and getting your nose broken. It's getting cut with razor blades. Being framed for things you did not do etc. If you only knew how some good decent people have to put up with mean evil people and don't fight back because they are in essence good decent people.

Quit trolling on this article and just accept that there are mean people in the world. Wow, the idiocy of such blatant trolls... They need a life. =D

My attitude toward society is deteriorating rapidly these days. I feel stressed, worried, jaded and plain bitter towards our economy. There is no individuality anymore and were left to fend for ourselfes.Yes people participate with evil daily and dont give 2 #%:'s about you or me.There are nice people yes but most of them are too concerned for themselfes. Can you blame them? Kiss my * ugly world!

I didn't mean to go to this site but glad i did. I'm so glad there are others who wonder the same thing, i do it all the time. I can tell you this what i hear at work which is retail would almost make you hate some people the way in which they speak to children and i mean even 6 mo. old .oh shut up i feed you now stay sitting up ,then take and roughly sit them up cause they cant really do it them self. and i have called dept of human services when i saw even worse cases. got there plate no. i dont have a problem . i do belive there are so many factors, not just parents. tv yes ,see what is on for everyone to get ideas from .would like to know why producers are able to put things on prime time an they allow it . i have so many thoughts i want to share but gotta go for now. i'll be back. with more thoughts would like to have feed back. signing off . L. A.

why are people so mean i hate that!!!!!!!!!!!!

People have been hurt and can't let go of that experience. The best thing to do is try not to think about it so much and be active with positive things and people.

I love this story it sounds like a very logical answer but I just want to add one thing to this beautiful persons story , sence I believe in the bible The book of revelation brings out that Satan has a lot of anger cuss he only has a short peroid of time left to rule on this planet. So he has a big influence on even every one and that's not to mention our imperfect messed up brains. Please be nice EVERY oNE

dlilafae: People can be so small sometimes. Just the common human act of looking someone directly in the eyes has such a positive impact on people. I work in retail (med industry) and some people are so mad/angry and frustrated, but just by engaging them with direct eye contact, respect and a truthful respectful answer that goes like this... "I have no good answer to why this happened, but I promise you, I will work it out". I works! We are so disconnected from each other these days. No one wants to stop and listen or give you the respect to hear you out. At work, (I'm very new in this industry) the trainer is rude, narcissistic and condescending. In a month and a half I hate it and have already asked for a transfer. IF you are training someone, be PATIENT, and..... train them. Don't send them off to do all the things you don't want to do, while you go off to back-stab them and leave them all by themselves to figure 6 simultaneous situations by themselves. STOP IT! Grown up and get some self esteem.

I grew up with mean people my entire life. My family my friends. Iv grown upwith such pain hatred and sadness it drove me to becoming mute and never looking people in the eyes. I dropped out of school in 6th grade. I had an abusive mother, aunt and grandmother. My father gave up on me. my siblings had there own lives becuase they were much older than me. Im finally getting away from a mother who stole from Me a father who chose his abuse wife and material posessions over me a brother who bad
Mouths me a sister who is selfish. Iv been hurt and taken advantage of by my family and friends i have met. Im surprised i havent hung myself from all the abnormal abuse from childhood and teenage years. Im a talented artist i draw sculpt sing write music direct create and more importantly im a very good person to others. All the pain thay has been inflicted on me created the total opposite of what they all are. Iv never known love from a mother or father i had only the love from an abusive exgirlfriend who hurt me in so many destructive ways. The people that do know me would never have guessed the upbringing i had. Dont allow anyone to be mean to you. Get away from Them. Mean people only deserve each other. It took me years my entire life to have the strength to get away or i would have ended my life. Mean people deserve no akmowledgment they are nothing and they are not there.

After reading a few comments and noticing how many people are complaining about people being mean, how about we do something about it? When someone is mean, be nice. If someone acts like a big * online, find someone who's in your position and be nice/help them.

Why do I say do this? A few days ago I asked for help somewhere online, but I was given a very rude response by some "Published" author in Maryland calling me "Lazy" and "Stupid" because I was asking a question. Mind you, I asked this question on a "help" forum, help being the keyword. So what did I do? I found one of their forum's competing sites, and helped 5 people on that site with their problems, no matter how stupid, or how childish they acted (Mind you, there is a big language barrier online as you can't tell other people's emotion, it could have just been bad communication).

So that is what I suggest people, when someone is mean, don't just complain about it, make it your goal to help someone else, that's true way we can defeat the mean and rude in this world.

- C

Oh quit trolling this site and giving us a sense of validation that we should even help these mean people. Must I remind you that there are some, but not most of them that have narcissistic personality disorder? They probably don't give a **** about you or me no matter how many times we help them.

So please, just quit kidding yourself and accept facts already that this world is pretty much cruel in a horrible horrible way that goes way back thousands of years ago. They won't change at all for the fact that they are too self-concerned for themselves.

The more you keep trying to please these "mean people" then there is a possibility that they don't even want to live up to our standards. No use letting these twisted, ill-minded beings ask for our help when we can't take anymore of the harm they continue to put towards us.

I'm sorry, but you are trolling for the sake of pleasing mean people for justification. =]

@Comment #118.1 by: Anonymous on 24 Jan 2012, 04:01 GMT

I was not trolling at all, and I never said I was giving vaildation to these mean people, I simply said if someone is mean to you, find someone else who needs help and help them. Kindness goes a long way.

If you want to have such a negative and pessimistic outlook on life, then fine go ahead.

Yes you are trolling, coming back here and checking your replies to your post means that you really are. How idiotic can you be? Must of been trolling on other sites as well I see. Well... you have the tendency to let my replies bother you in any way, so that must suck for you. I feel sorry for your loss that you even gave mean people a cold shoulder for their expense.

Replying to this article one more time and your basically trolling. Okay have a nice day! Oh, and I hope I wasn't being negative or pessimistic to you as well. kthxbai! =D

And another thing... you spelled "validation" wrong. You're like "vaildation". Wow, I must say from personal experience that is pretty super fail on your part. Now anything stupid and unreasonable you like to add at this point? =]

I am in complete agreement with you. :-)

if only we can get the women to not be so * nasty today, then maybe it would just work.

Unfortunately, Tabitha, being nice to a super-nasty, mean person generally doesn't work. If possible, avoid them as much as possible, or, if necessary, give them a taste of their own medicine. Mean people need to know what it's like to be on the receiving end of the meanness. Trying to rise above them by being patronizing or super-nice will only backfire, because they'll really do a job on you.

Hello and I truly hope all is well for all of you writers and readers!

I am thinking that most of you who came to this site got fed up with people being mean to you and you wondered if you were the only one out there on the receiving end and why. I would like to share my thoughts and vent a bit too, so I apologize for the length, but hope that someone will benefit from what I have written:

First, I find it difficult to accept that people who have been hurt become mean. Maybe angry, irritable, or antisocial, but not necessarily mean.

I think meaness is a negative reaction to an emotional feeling.
Meaness should not be confused with anger, aggitation, irritation, sadness, or other emotions/feelings we may experience. It is what we do with these emotions/feelings that lead to a mean act if not realized or corrected on how to handle the emotion.
It is a negative emotional reaction which results in a lashing out to others, to make others feel the miserable state that the one being mean is experiencing. It is basically in my mind, an untrained human's way of negative sharing, and to bring you down to their level of unhappiness- Misery loves company.

I like to think that I am a nice person and have always try to stay positive; however, it has been very difficult to be that way because when I am nice to people they want to walk all over me. I am not perfect by a long shot, not beautiful, but I have always maintained a set of strong values and goals for my own self improvement through life to be successful.

I don't follow a crowd "just because"- without any explanation of why I should. I am in control of my life and decide if that is the direction I want to take.

In a way, I am a loner because I don't feel comfortable with many of the people that I see around me. What I see are people who are greedy, vain, selfish, and only think of what they want-self satisfaction, and if someone does not play their way then they get pushed out of the way; to me that is another reason why people are mean- their own perception of their self-importance, which I often see is over-inflated.

People copy other people from childhood to adulthood. If someone sees that doing drugs, drinking, being mean to others makes them feel accepted and cool, their need to feel accepted and to feel important /to belong is what I think makes them start that path of destruction.

These people, in my opinion, have very few values and no set goals in life, they live only for the here and now-instant gratification and find those bad habits as a way to escape. As many of us know, drug addicts and alcoholics are mean. How could they not be when their body and mind is consummed with chemicals that are destroying their reasoning, which makes them irritable and their behavior is often irrational-mean.

I am not saying a social drink here or there is wrong by any means, but moderation should be the rule for most people, and for some people they should never touch alcohol because something in their make-up does not know what moderation is. As for any kind of drug it should be prescribed by your doctor and taken as indicated only.

In our society, I have noticed over the years, that schools(teachers), families(parents) and media(television) have greatly failed teaching good values to the young people. When they don't see good(by example), or know what is good, or how to be good they are left are on their own and now we see the results.. Being mean, rude, inconsiderate is what appears to be the acceptable behavior for the majority, rather than the minority.

The only way that I see meaness being pushed out of the majority is by treating it as the wrong way to be- unacceptable behavior, and being good, kind and positive as the true way for a happier more successful person and society.

Being imperfect, no one human will always be 100% all day and night good, kind, and positive, but when those mean moments do pop up in a person, knowing how to handle those moments when around other people so the mean moments don't pass on to others can be learned, but then what is the use of learning (having the tools of kindness) if not used or set to practice?

And, again I stress it must be learned, the earlier the better; no-one is to old to learn to be nice.

Being old does not give one the right to be mean. Being rich does not give one the right to be mean. Being born in poverty and living in it a lifetime does not give one the right to be mean. Being of a certain race, color or religious group does not give one the right to be mean. Good looks, stardom, higher rank at work and whatever else that some people think allows them to get away with being mean to others, is simply not acceptable.

Are there levels of meaness? Like being a little bit drunk, drunk, or very drunk? Just the word drunk being applied to a drinking person's present condition should answer that question.

Our society has become so complex with television/movies and computers projecting how we as people should look, what we should own to be accepted, what we should buy our children to be cool parents, what clothes, body shapes to have- everything but values.

One example of mean people I would like to share is a web site MSN games I used to love to go to and play a variety of games. I started playing back in 2007 and through the years I noticed an increase in the mean people who come on that play in the Spades card game. They hit the double nill or the 13 tricks and then exit the game, they do this over and over and over. This mean act ruins the game for those that want to play a real game.

I am disabled(bad hips) and when I go to the grocery store I park in the disabled spot(with my disabled sticker)when a disabled spot is available because many times those people who are not disabled park in those spots. I have to walk with a cane to get into the store and use an automatic cart. While shopping, people with their baskets come rushing past me nearly running me over or grunting in displeasure because my auto cart isn't going fast enough for them (I have no control that the carts are made to putter slow). I stay to the side of the isle to give people room. I am in constant levels of pain with my disability and if I can be nice why can't they? I didn't ask to be disabled it just happened.

But then again, when I wasn't disabled and would go to the malls, I remember people running into me not saying excuse me. I often wondered if I was invisable!
Driving cars - people cutting infront to get to the red light faster. Alot of these examples are just inconsiderate people, but that is a form of being mean is it not?

In the beginning of time wars were fought for land, food, and wealth. Humans were designed to survive. One would think that in humans short duration here on earth in comparison to other past forms of life, such as the dinosaur age, that we here and now do not have to fight for land, food or wealth- work to gain our comfort yes, but not kill, mame, rape, or injure anyone for personal gain.

These are my thoughts from experience and observation over the 62 years I have been living here on planet earth with other humans. I only wrote a couple of "humans being mean" incidents. These are so very mild in comparison to the truly mean acts that I have received over the years from some people I knew and considered friends, and by people I hardly knew at all. I believe their acts of meaness to have been a result of jealousy, envy and their own weaknesses, which they had no desire to improve.

Revenge? No. Yes, I did get upset, angry, sad, as a result of the meaness from these people, but I had to tell myself that if I crossed over and took revenge then I would be reducing myself to their level and be a mean person. I have to live with me and my actions and I don't want to carry that kind of negative baggage with me.

Life is not always fair-infact, it is very hard. Full of obstacles that get in the way when one trys to be successful, happy, and nice, but I earned my badges of courage (invisable)
and have learned to be kind to myself and realize that when bad things happen it isn't my fault, that there are just people out there that have a real problem with successful, nice people, and their meanness eats away at them until there is nothing left of them, while I am full of the good things that I have done.

Love to all nice people, you know who you are-Tata!

this is so true, i also find myself wondering why people are so mean. i think about this allllllllll.... the time and so many things cross my mind.As to why? but your right about one think about when they got hurt and just won't let it go already . i feel and know now that all this shall pass when you as peson give all your cares to GOD he as all the answers to a joyful life!!!

This is great! I have had so many mean people to go off on me this week. It wasn't anything I did, they just don't care if they hurt your feelings. I am really confused, I try to be so nice to everyone. Is there something weird going on with the stars, moon, etc?

I think you're right. I never did get how people could be so mean, especially when its for no reason! I'd share something myself, but I don't want you to think that all middle school girls are mean & only think about sex. Its probably just that particular girl. Anyway, you are right. Ever since I first started in preschool I realized how cruel people are now. They'd even make fun of you just for being dark skinned, even when they are too! The nerve of some people.

so true. everyone is so mean that everyone is cyber bullying me

Been there, too. People are the most cowardly over the internet. They have nothing to say to your face, but in front of that computer screen they turn into chatty Cathys! Try your absolute best to not let it get to you, that's what I did. Guys said horrible and vicious things about me for years on line, for everyone to see, as if I wasn't humiliated enough. I just waited for it to end. Eventually the Paranas will move on.

people have no right 2 be so mean!

People are evil, miserable, and vicious toads. I got my stuff tampered with today, and the person who did messed with my stuff left my stuff all dismantled for me to come back and see the next day. Whoever did it went out of their way to make sure I would find what they did and then be in shock about it. From what I have seen today and from what I witness through out my life people are terrible. They are wicked at their cores. It is human nature to be wicked. No one is raised with morals and respect for others any more. Something very personal and near and dear to me was destroyed all for the chuckles and giggles of someone else. People make me sick. After today I have officially lost all faith in man kind as a whole.

devin is so mean

People are afraid to be wrong or proven wrong and think they are so much smarter than each other and want to prove it and hurt each other.

It really does seem like people are getting worse and worse in our culture. Resentment, a short fuse, everybody is so irritable and touchy and unhappy. Our culture has become increasingly selfish, egotistical, and individualist. I remember 20 years ago that nobody "went off" on each other in our town the way people do now all over. Sure, I grew up in a small town, maybe I was kind of sheltered, but everybody I know says the same thing. People in the US are getting meaner all the time. We are creating our own misery.

Humanity has evolved enough to value kindness..but has not evolved enough to actually be kind.

I'm sick of mean people. I'm tired of being nice. People know I'm patient and they take advantage of it. The problem is when I get to the end of my endurance, it's like holy hell. Maybe even unexpected. I'm not a yo,yo that will just bounce back. I am a Christian also. So being forgiving is my philosophy. Being a push over is not. I don't think Jesus was a push over either. He took a whip to the money changers and told dignities their day of judgement was coming. They might as well be dead because they believed not in real love or the works of God. So what do I do about these mean people. I ignore them like the blade of grass that is quickly withered by the heat of the sun. If I'm smart enough I let them know in a clever way just how mean they are. Maybe they will say they're sorry. But if not, I separate myself from that person. There is nothing we can do but endure, or get caught in an act which only makes us look bad. The worst thing we could do is take our frustration out on other innocent people. I feel very sorry for those who have to live with mean people because they are the bread winners. It's a sadness that too many people know. May God give the peace and comfort we need. May we get through life, and be justified in the end. The goodness of god is greater than the sinfulness of man.

Personally, I believe that people have lost sight of true love, being loved, and loving other people. I am a Christian and the best love a person can get is the Love of the Lord. Many of us have up and left basic manners, attitudes, greetings, and trust.

There are way too many people with attitude problems, anger, hostility because the people aren't sowing the right seeds. We want people to be nice, but we aren't giving out nice, positive attitudes to strangers.

You can't change how other people act, think, feel, and so on. You can only change your actions, thoughts, and feelings. Pass it on, this is the seed of people being nicer, more friendly, and etc.

I don't think they were hurt inside. In my opinion and fact is they are so rotten,mean and negative to us. They have no respect for other. They come into your life and destory your happiness, reputation and everything that you love without your permitt and knowledge. They got what they want. It make them feeling better and move on with their lives. A friend say "it can't work and move on." I don't get it? Besides, to stay positive.

Without love everything falls apart. Prove me wrong.

I just want to say ty... I've noticed this mean ness in the past few years & I still ask the same question. I don't get it. Why are people so mean. Esp on the internet. Its good to know that other ppl feel the same way about it. Thx for your insite. Be good to 1 another ppl

I work for a store where we have to check they're receipt before going out of the store. I have only work there for few months now and I can not believe how people can be horrifyingly mean when you ask for thy're receipt. I have had people call me names, telling me I'm racist when my color is brown, swear at me, and etc. ( Do to others what you want them do to you). This are my motto that I grew up with, so why do people act so mean and rude to others? I have learned by working in a department store that people can such dOepressingly rude and mean because they do not have any happiness nor anyone that can make them happy. Therefore they will eagerly throw they're negativeness around those people who they can first interact with. Those people who are mean to others live in they're sadness of their life.

There are several reasons why people are mean and it's different for everybody. For some people, they're mean because they've been treated mean by someone or more than one person for way too long and they've come to the point where they have become comfortably numb; so numb, in fact, that they don't even realize when they are being mean. Another reason is, suffering; which kind of goes with the first reason. People who suffer for so long and don't get enough relief from it, get tired of never having any happiness so they just shut down and say "screw it" and stop trying to be good and/or happy and/or nice. What does it get you in life to be good or happy or nice if all you ever do is struggle and suffer? It's a mind-set that can happen to the best of people if you have more stress than you can handle. Why do you think those trust-fund babies and other rich people are laughing all the time? They have the money to be entertained and have a fun life!! AND YET, in return, they look down on people and treat people like crap. So, what is the answer? There isn't one other than take one day at a time and if you fail today, try to do better tomorrow.

I have seen this kinds of obstacles my WHOLE LIFE and you know what?

I know this will sound strange and off the wall like I am on drugs but please here me out before you label me anything!! :o

I've done my own research on this subject like the site (Reality Shifters or Montalk) just to be sure I wasn't going crazy and I believe obstacles like this are divine obstacles as time I am finding out is NOT liner but rather time can slow/stop/speed up and even weave in and out of different conjunction points.

In your case I believe you might have had some kind of time-bleed where two realities meet up which is likely why the cigarette driver didn't notice you because in HIS timeline you are NOT there. Who knows what is going on his point of view!
I also have found out these kinds of things happen more often when we are in an emotional excited state like in a hurry to get somewhere on time.


I've had my share of weird crap related to time variations though mostly negative synchronitcities or however the hell you spell that word.


In fact one thing I find rarely talked about is negative synchroniticies as people always talk about positive ones which I rarely ever had but that's another subject for another time. I could almost write a book about that word but no matter how hard I try I cannot remember how to spell it.
I feel as if there is some kind of mental blockade that's preventing me from ever learning that word or phrase and it took a lot of effort to type this. -_-

*continued from last post*

I grew up fearing change a lot (mumbles to self) so perhaps that could play a role into why I attract negative Synchroncitiy and greedy people who want to take advantage of me unless I nip them in the bud?

I have no friends because of this but I have decided I'd rather be alone then with corrupted people so as the saying of my life goes and I will quote "If it's too good to be true then it is!" unquote.

I wonder where my extreme fear of change came from as I wasn't physically abused and my parents do their best to take care of me.

I think this is a global phenomenon..It has a lot of reasons,lack of culture,not following the Bible's or simply general civilization's values etc.
A world influenced by dull leaders,strange pop stars(Lady Gaga) or neglecting old cultural models is getting more and more impolite,bad mannered and mean..Probably the whole humankind-the majority of it-will experience a downturn of its nature,I mean an Earth where Mozart and Shakespeare lived and influenced human development one day,now will get to a devalualised stage,where humankind won't follow or respect traditional human values like behaving in a civilised manner,respecting others and yourself,etc.this is the bright future believe..

this guy is so mean he says go away or something his name is roberto

I have noticed this too!! I am a nice person and go out of my way to treat others well simply because it is the right thing to do. My motto is "Be the change you wish to see in the world. " I refuse to give in and be mean too. Being nice feels much better and I get good sleep at night! :) Keep on fighting the good fight!

Well, yes I somewhat agree with your thoughts on human behavior; but I don' t think that because people are hurt is the answer o their mean ways.

I agree with you, some people are just plain ol dirty. I was in tears and so hurt by the way I was treated today. I was at a bus stop, I never take the bus, plus I was new in the area and did not know what time the buses ran, so I asked a young man, who was walking by if he knew what time the buses ran, he told me the buses run all day long, and I told him thank you very much, But I rememebr calling the bus line and they said something different, that the buses stop running at a certain time, so I asked politely if he was sure if the buses ran all day long, and he rudley said "can you read!!! it says right here, look at the bus schedule it says the buses run all day long, ", I ignorned what he said rudely to me, and told him thank you very much, and told him he was very smart, and he rudely said " yeah go to school and learn something" I was just in total shock, I have never experienced anyone so mean to me before, when I was so polite to them. I am deeply hurt how he treated me, I been trying to figure out why was he so mean to me, I never seen him before except for this one time, I just cannot figure outway he disrespect me this way. When I was so polite to him. And just to think about it I find alot of people who disrespect me, even my own blood twin sister. I do not understand it, when I am so nice, are people trying to take advantage of my kindness, alot of people do appreciate my kindness, but there are also people who are very mean to me why? It really hurts my feeling, can some please explain to me why are some people this way toward me :(

I read most of the article and would continue but my patience is very thing at this moment in time of speaking, absolutely will probably read it at sometime. I'm very hurt by how others treat eachother really. Since the beginning of time i bet it has been bothering men and women. I truly wish people could be accepted for the individuals they choose to be. As long as there not physically hurting anyone why should it be a bother, alot of people just want to be free'd not judged because there not influencing them in the ways they're looking to get from you. It reaslly frustrating. Hurts my selfesteem how bullysome peopel are when your not putting on a BIG act.

sparkler continues...
I've noticed if your not putting on a BIG gigantic act that that's when people really have a problem. I've never been a peopel person and never really want to be. There's not enough people like me to wanna learn there way. I would ran live with eyes wide open, and seeing things my way. then to live half way open, and be forced into there standard of vewing things. Now, i understand there may be a time for discipline and you msut do your job and be disciplined to have to work by others that is the only time I would ever feel need to wanna change for people. So going back since trailing off my train of thought to stay on topic. Basically i feel like people are in a state of constant unhappiness because were all unique beings that the world wants to trap into a cookie cutter shaped for what it is trying to demand of us. I am silly, i can have multi-personalities but, that's the way i like it. The reason why others may not like it, is because they dont have the guts or the will, or the ability to be me. It is a jealousy thing ,i beleive. You will get this feeling of "not being good enough "everywhere u can think of. The world is filled with these toxic creatures who wnna bring you down. Cant let em' hurt ya. We are all beautiful by God. We need to love eachother for who we are individually,Who came up with this One way of thinking stuff has made me irritated. because it leaves people discluded. People such as myself dont find this out until later in there life because they were too busy free floating and being myself i didn't have time to worry over such crap! My advice to you is to just go with the flow, they're always going to be around you. Just be confident, always be professional at work, work is work, not always play.Just know you'd rather be You, than some idiot who wants to be maliscious and pick on someone completely innocent who hasa good heart, so much harder to be them then it is for you. You'll never have to go through with wanting to put harm on people who done u no harm. So count it lucky, you still have your heart and you still know yourself. people who wanna hurt, lost sense of themself. Sorry to hear about it, life is suppsoe to be a little funny sometimes not all the way smooth rolling and going.Try to always focus on what makes u happy and luagh. Stay about from the crazies, just know they're alot worse off then you are, no matter how many you see. Good luck with life, god bless

people, lets be happy and take the time to ENJOY life. life is too short to be unhappy or unthoughtful, or both. my advice is, just slow down and think how you would like to be treated. enjoy the wonderful beauties of nature and life itself. please be kind, THANK YOU. shane, pennsylvania

I think people are mean just because they can and it gives them a power feeling... I know some people who's lives are good and they are still rude as ever.... and its like wt?

I don't know what to say everyone is still mean

In some cases people are mean because they are innately mean, such as racists picking on certain races or ganging up to bully people. These are despicable people who probably started doing so when they were very little, such as before grade school. I really don't care if their parents neglected them or whatever. It is both their own fault that they do not realize how their actions negatively affect others and it is also the parents' fault for not teaching their children how to be nice in order to make this world a better place. Honestly I wouldn't shed a tear if all the racists, bullies, and greedy, no-good, dishonorable people were all thrown into nazi style concentration camps and thrown into an oven, because these people are here for the sole purpose of making others miserable and nothing you do will be able to change them. This is why I avoid interaction with most people and only interact with them for the most basic of necessities such as buying things from the grocery story or dealing business. Other than that, I say * people in general. There may be a few nice people in the pile of * called humanity but I have yet to find somebody like that to befriend.

Hi my name is smitha y mavani In this world everyone are mean even our own family members this days people valve ur money not u and when u dont have money ur just like waste person and worst i m working in call center from past 4years and when i get my salary my family members behave as of they care of me and i fall of it as i m all alone i think ke if i give them my salary they will care me but i m sure but still i do that's because i need love and which i never found from the time i m born my parents love my sister and care her and for me they treat like as of i m waste and they dont send her for work and i have to come to work if i m sick also and i work for international call and i ear 20k and whoever i meant in my life everyone r mean i cry and take out my pain but end of the day i feel alone being GIRL so u people dont fall for mean people let it be whoever ............

i completely agree with what this articles states. In a substantial way; people are hurt all the time: however its their attitudes towards their situations that alters their reactions towards them. It´s amazing what some kindness and love can achieve; after spending almost a whole year in an exchange program in France I thought it would be IMPOSSIBLE to pass Junior year. However even though my grades were not marvelous ( to say it in the most ¨positive¨ terms..if you define a 15% average in French Literature enough to pass the year..go ahead..be my guest) I always spoke with the teachers after class. I told them how much i was trsuggling with everything in school; but how much I was truly willing to succeed. Eventually; after a whole year of crying, fighting, and failing a bunch of tests..the teachers decided my effort was worth it and gave me the YEAR! I don´t think I´ve ever been this proud and positively intrigued as I was. Plus; I got a whole bunch of wonderful reccomendation letters and was invited by the school director to stay..FOR ANOTHER YEAR! And..also passed the year with honors..So much of some French Oh la la! Hospitality :)

especially the low life women today, with their * DON'T STINK OF AN ATTITUDE. certainly not so many GOOD WOMEN left nowadays.

I am writing in because I am sooo frustrated with people being rude and thoughtless, especially the women that I come across through my daughter's school and outside activities! You would think I was an enemy the way they glare at me! I try to iniate some pleasant social conversation and they act as if I don't have the right to look at them let alone talk to them!!!! What am I doing wrong?!!!!!!!!!! I am trying to show my shy daughter to open up to people but I am afraid I am getting very discouraged at the parents and their attitude!!! I can understand having a bad day, but I was not brought up to be so unaware of other peoples feelings! Also, sent out 15 invitations for my daughter's birthday party - only one person RSVP !!!! What the hell is this?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

women have become so rotten nowadays, and many of them think that they are all that. why is that? many of you women are certainly not all that, many of you are SUCH LOSERS TODAY. many women today need to read a book on to talk too men better, and get rid of the ATTITUDE PROBLEM. years ago, women were a lot more educated than the ones out there now. even if you try to look at a woman too long, they just walk away when i would try to start a CONVERSATION with them. another reason why it has become so very hard for us STRAIGHT GUYS that are looking to meet a GOOD WOMAN TODAY. hey wait, did i say a good woman? where would they be now?

You need to move town by the sound of it, if I was surrounded by that many mean women, I certainly would lol (I'm female, and I agree when you get a group a mean women it can make you feel so small) be the better person and hold your chin high, in the end if they treat you with distain, they really aren't worth the effort. There are some good ones left, we just don't hang around with the catty ones :-D

So why are you being such a hypocrite then?! I'm certainly not, except whatever goes around, comes around only!

you women that are NASTY, are certainly not worth meeting anyway. many of you must have had a very troubled past, or you were very abused by men at one time. but don't go taking it out on us INNOCENT MEN that are seriously looking to meet a GOOD WOMAN TODAY, if there are any DECENT ONES LEFT.

Everyone is mean to me even my aunt!

I lived in several cities. I came from a small-town background. After being in this redneck lowlife town in Minnesota, I can say for certainty that the anonymity of a larger town (LA, Vegas, etc, etc.) is precious. Having been here 7 years I can't wait to get away from gossiping, bigoted, mean-spirited rubbernecking people who live on gossip and lies. They cheat each other, interbreed, stab one another in the back, and are intolerant of change. I am an ordinary, white, married 65 year old woman; I don't smoke or drink, and I don't care if you do. I don't care if any one else isn't Lutheran, is LGBTQI, is richer or poorer than me. I feel like I am living in the movie Deliverance. I plan to leave as soon as I can, to get back to a large enough city where I can choose to interact with people, or not. These small towns are, for me, unhealthy.

i know this may be old but, as I have searching for an answer i decided to google this so here it is I found this article. I have been hurt so many times it is ridiculous and I simply can't figure it out. This hatfullness that people have inside the selfishness people have inside that they release in this world it is beyond belief as if to be some sort of disease that lots of people have become affected by. It's people families,friends,co-workers,lovers I mean it is out of control we just live in a hateful world and to be truthful about it all I have been done wrong by so many so-called christ like folks they are the meaniest I will never step foot back into a church again.

I hate mean people . why would u want to be a mean person? mean people have no friends! Do you want friends? I thought so. It makes it seem as if their entire purpose in life is to expand the population of mean people around the globe till there is absolutely no one left who has any sense of kindness inside of them.

It's not true that mean people have no friends, Peace on Earth! I've known plenty of mean people who do have friends, and they incite their friends into meanness. It's disgusting.

the women are certainly the worst, especially that many of them have become so very difficult to start a conversation with. then they wonder why that so many of us GOOD STRAIGHT MEN have trouble finding the right woman nowadays. many of the woman today, are a LOW LIFE to begin with. i am so sick and tired of you women playing hard to get, and get rid of the attitude problem like the other man said. there are so many of the women that are LESBIANS ANYWAY, and what a waste of humanity that many of you are.

Looks like you need a chill pill, troll. You're human too. Makes you the hypocrite on the interwebs. Wow, such a waste of time typing that BS statement.

Kthxbai! ^_^

The worst are what I call the nasty nicers. The devil I know is a lot better than the devil I don't know.

I think being mean empowers some people. If they get away with it then they are more empowered. I believe in kindness and caring actions when possible. There are times when you just have to stand up to someone who is being mean or inconsiderate. You do have to pick your battles carefully though. Look, the fact is there are caring, compassionate people in the world and there are those who only care about themselves or abuse others. It's always been that way. It won't change my belief that love is still the most powerful force in the universe.

yes i think that everyone should be nice and do not send a luky pretty singer death threats that is so mean my name is alexis cunningham i want to be a singer and be nice to any and every one
i am only 13 years old in 7th grade and my emaile adress is email me if you got my notice

BE A NICE AND GOOD PERSON TODAY

I find that no matter how nice I am to people and helpful they just don't reciprocate. I only get fake promises.

Here's the thing. You start off by saying how you do the same gossiping. That in itself should tell you to fix YOURSELF and stop worrying about everyone else! Stop trying to fix the world with your quirky little ideas and apply them to your own life first. Then, when you make some serious ground and see if they really work, write a story...

I love martha beck reply you made me lmao and Im happy now I original Rendemely type that question to see if their was any feeling my fustration it's a joke I hang out with a buch of mates that live to put each other down it really to be the ultimate dominator.. It's absolutely bad and I hate it and I really think its all the guns violence music,song, games that have a part in our lives cause if you think about it they say it's getting worse in time.. There wasnt all this stuff back in the days

brilliant

I thankyou for sharing your thoughts, because I often have the same thoughts. I have been wounded, I had one of those childhoods-abuse, neglect, fosterhomes, alcoholism, drug addiction, incarceration et.. I am lucky that I have a heart, and a conscience. I can not just go along and take out my anger and hurt on innocent bystanders. I also know in my heart that what I put out comes back to me- Karma. I cannot, in good conscience, go around being mean to others. I am holding myself down. How could I sleep at night?. Gossip is probablly one of the biggest culprits. Let me stop beating up myself, and instead take responsibility for my feelings and make better choices. Noone can make me happier than I can make myself. Whenever I can take the high road, not give in to ego driven anger, I will guarantee that I can hold my head up and feel good about myself. Well then of course that would stand to prove that when I give in to meanness, I will probablly be adding to my negative bagagge that I carry around. There won't be any pep in my step. Rather I will probablly look guilty, walk with my head down etc.. I will continue to care for myself and therefore not kid myself that whatever energy I put out will, I say will come back to me. I deserve to feel comfortable within my own skin, no matter what they may or may not be doing.

i do have to say that reading a lot of these comments about women is very true today, and many women out there now are so * mean and nasty. why are you women so rotten today? it is very obvious to me meeting a good woman will be very hard because of the way that you are. i certainly can't blame myself, since i did not do anything wrong on my part. now that there seems to be so many women into other women today, that will certainly add to the problem too.

I think this is a great article. Bullying must stop.

Wish it could all be fixed. Wish those who think they are picked on would quit picking and convincing their friends to pick too. Is it socialism at its finest? or social dysfunction?

Wow, just read all of these posts because of how awfully I was treated in a situation where I was not at fault. I don't know whether to be thankful others feel this way or to go vomit. I've cried for two days trying to understand why people who don't even know me were so hateful and cruel. Men as well as women and no one willing to step in to help.

seriously..to many bad things and confusing things going on around this world in every country...we all aspire to be simply happy in our home and families but to much greed and hate...what on earth did we all do to each other to create so much hate towards each other? Human beings are nice inside....especially during tragedies we help each other out like it was the first time we ever walked....but our busy life styles just don't connect anymore..we have our face in the ipads, iphones,facebook, twitter, texting,,,really even my son in the Navy emails and texts..forgot what his voice sounds like....someone needs to stop all this tech nonsense and start up sitting on a porch at the neighbors and visit and have a talk with a cold one...I do with my neighbors..it is cool you actually read expressions on their faces...well I say toss the cell...people had to wait until you came home to answer the phone to reach you...remember those days...while you actually picked up a book hard back or paper didn,t matter and read and turned pages..litterally with your fingers...I think tech is very cool..but sure takes away from the softer side we use to call telephone. Anyways

Well that sucks for you :D

Wow, "Derp". A name that is so unoriginal and yet you troll here wasted 5 minutes just to type that? Ha! No wonder they call you a "Derp" which is most understandable than most people wanting to pick on the nice ones.

Keep trolling bro! Makes you first in line to be one of the top BSers that ever lived. =D
It must make sense that you came here in order to bismirch yourself foolishly like the fail troll that you are. kthxbai ^_^

P.S. Commenting back here and saying whatever insults you want inputted must mean that you proved this article's point about those "mean" people. So keep it coming, "Derp". You want to prove this point that these people will continue to exist. =D

Omg. I totally agree with this article. Some people weren't born mean but it's the fact that some people have experienced taken advantage of, so they turn mean so other people wouldn't take advantage of them. They just feel scared and want to protect themselves.
Some people aren't mean because they don't want to be a hypocrite. They understand the feeling of being taken advantage of so they try not to do the same to other people.

actually some people just want to be hilarious or something so they say mean stuff like,"hey the ugly store called & they want their face back" and then his/her friends laugh so they do it to simply feed their popularity (cuz theyre idiots)

you guys are just telling each other off (or at least trying to) so you forget what the article is actually about anyway i didn't really understand this (not because im still in grade school) because this guy needs to realize what he does to people daily

Ugly dude gets picked on by pretty mean fool, ugly dude decides "i dont have to take this crap and knocks out pretty mean fool.
Ugly dude then becomes ugly mean dude and then get abused by pretty mean fools chums who are also pretty mean.
Ugly mean dude cant knock out all these village idiots, what to do.

Social norms are gone only the borg remains....

Well. Like my dad used to say"that's why there are so many humps in the ground"taking your hurt and out on innocent people can cost you your life because that person could be hurting too especially in big cities where guns are plentiful so check yourself before you wreck yourself.

A

it's so sad though because before everybody was nice like in 2005 and then now in 2013 everyone just loves being mean to oneanother! it's so annoying!! :(

plenty of reasons to be mean no reason not to be mean

is it really mean to just ignore somone? it would be if they were in danger
whats more is its usually the way you say things that hurts somones feelings not just the actual words like if i was talking to you while you were watching a show and you said no i dont wana know right now im enjoying my show
there are really two ways of conveying what you really mean the nice polite way of toneing it and the mean nasty way yet since they havent technically said anything too bad they can get away with being as nasty as they wantanytime they want and deny it
let me be the one to say PLEASE dont make up any rules they only serve the nasty
do what you feel is right in every differnt situation its harder then you think and i bet you cant do it and if you can it wont be what you thought it would be do you have the spine to do whats right? i doubt it

Last year I had Heart surgery and was shocked to see an old man across the room from me being starved. I questioned the nursing staff about this and the reply was "that;s not my job"
Well I'd Love to know who's f"ing job it is then?
Is this the sort of behaviour that the human race has been reduced to? Thankfully his beautiful family was called back from their holidays and they fed him.
I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about getting older, and these people may eventually have the power to cut your life short if they don't feel your worth saving. (euthanasia). Where did kindness and patience go?
Have we just become so cold to other peoples suffering that we have become inhumane?
For the love of GOD and your fellow man instead of trying to save the f''ing planet and the animals try saving each other.
Do unto others as you would have done unto you. GOD bless those good Nurses they are few and far between and they have a lot to teach. Listen to the suffering don't go cold and you will become a better person a person that GOD will cherish. Thanks for listening Belle