Singer reveals heartbreaking decision in new book, “Unbreak My Heart”

May 24, 2014 08:37 GMT  ·  By
Toni Braxton opens up about abortion, son’s autism, and financial problems in her new book
   Toni Braxton opens up about abortion, son’s autism, and financial problems in her new book

Because she was once one of the most in-demand singers, because of her powerful, unmistakable voice, and because of her many financial problems, including a couple of bankruptcy filings, it might feel like the amount of media attention Toni Braxton has been getting has left no stone unturned in her life.

Still, it seems that the singer has managed to keep certain details of her personal life well under wraps, even after she agreed to open the doors of her house to a camera crew, for a family reality show.

The most heartbreaking of all these secrets is, without a doubt, the fact that, in her early 30s, she had an abortion, as she reveals in her new book, aptly called “Unbreak My Heart,” just like one of her biggest hits to date.

In the book, Toni explains that, when she found out that she was carrying then-boyfriend Keri Lewis’ child, she was initially ecstatic about it. It was only later that she was told that the Accutane treatment she was on for her acne could lead to severe birth defects, like brain, heart, or face deformities.

She decided it was better to have an abortion but, when her next child, Diezel, was diagnosed with autism in 2006, she connected the two, believing that the latter would not have happened if she had just decided to keep the baby.

“I knew I’d taken a life… I believed God's payback was to give my son autism,” Toni writes in the book, as excerpts obtained by Radar Online confirm.

“I was suddenly faced with a choice I'd never thought I'd have to make. Amid my major misgivings about abortion, I eventually made the gut-wrenching decision… In my heart, I believed I had taken a life — an action that I thought God might one day punish me for… My initial rage was quickly followed by another strong emotion: guilt,” she continues.

Later in the book, the singer says that it could very well be that her son’s autism was triggered by vaccines, thus joining the long rank of celebrities who take this kind of a stance against them. Jenny McCarthy, now co-host on The View, is probably the one who got the most media attention for it. Officially, doctors have repeatedly stressed that there is no link between the two.

“Maybe it's just a coincidence that after my son's first MMR vaccine, I began to notice changes in him,” Toni writes, adding that she took a very affectionate and spirited boy into the hospital, and left with the opposite of that after the vaccine.