14 DAY TRIAL // In November last year, an official report revealed that, in the UK alone, the divorce cake business had reached an impressive level of success, with more and more couples falling for the idea that the best way to mark their divorce would be throwing a divorce party. Such a thing was initially inspired in the cases of some celebrities who perhaps were not even that fond of the idea of marriage to begin with, and is just as cruel and sad as celebrating an abortion, Virginia Ironside says for the Daily Mail.
Even in those cases when the spouse we’re leaving is an alcoholic or otherwise addicted, or an abuser, divorce is inevitably accompanied by a sense of failure and very conflicting and troubling emotions. There is little to celebrate to two people’s inability to make a beautiful thing, such as marriage, last a lifetime as it was supposed to, Ironside believes. In fact, celebrating a divorce is just as cruel as celebrating an abortion or the death of a loved one – and seeing it any other way is a poor judgment call.
“If a child dies, would you have a party? If you lost your job, would you celebrate? If your house burnt down, would you mark the event with a disco evening? The truth is there is no such a thing as a ‘good divorce.’ Even if your partner turned into a cruel dictator with psychotic tendencies, you could never call a divorce ‘good.’ Because a divorce is the end of a marriage that was originally made with love, respect, kindness and attraction, a contract that was intended to last, lovingly, for the rest of your lives. Every single person who was once married must have had some moments, at the beginning of the relationship, when they could see how it might work,” Ironside, a divorcee herself, says.
Several companies are already banking on people’s misery by catering for said divorce parties or providing the by-now traditional divorce cake. That’s not even the worst part, the report goes on to say: what’s more tragic about this new tendency is that people actually believe they have a reason to celebrate once their divorce is final. In doing so, under the excuse of starting a new phase in their life, they minimize the importance of the experience of divorce and, at the same time, of the marriage they had until not long. Above all, failure should never be celebrated, no matter what spin we put on it.
“Giving a party shows not only what a shallow person you are, but that you’re the sort of person who gloats when disasters happen or friendships fail. […] To have a divorce party or to give divorce present is like celebrating a miscarriage. It is insensitive and heartless. If you have to have a party, have the decency and honesty to call it what it is – a wake,” the same Daily Mail piece reads.