Everything that Paris does, she does good. Even more, she does great and that's a logical reasoning since her every move is of such interest for the media. Aside from the obvious things that generate coverage for the talented actress/singer (meaning, her more than confusing interviews, her public appearances - preferably without underwear -, the fact that she seems to live on an entire different planet than ours, that she never knows what she's talking about and the way she likes to party and shop like the real pro that she is), there are also other details of Miss Hilton's life that appeal to the general public.

A while ago, the Associated Press tried to impose an official Paris Hilton ban only to realize, a couple of days later, that such a thing was verging on the impossible. Therefore, having concrete proof that Paris is indestructible and a clue as to her never ever going away, we might as well do our best and keep you up to date about her current state of affairs.

Of course, we use the 'affairs' term in the loosest way imaginable, since the only affairs Paris is having imply a second person, of the opposite sex, if possible. This is probably about to change really soon: word on the street (in tabloids and rags, that is) has it that Paris is facing serious jail time. Like, up to 90 days! Yes, you read it right: NINETY entire days in a low security penitentiary. Gee, can you imagine the hell she would have to go through if things turn out like this?

The prosecutors are saying that they have clear facts to prove that Paris was driving with her license suspended on February 27, when a police unit pulled her Bentley over for not having the headlights on. For those who may not be in the know, Paris had her license suspended last September, when she was caught speeding after 'one Margarita' (to read: arrested for DUI) but she now claims she was not aware of the fact at the time she got behind the wheel of the car again.

However, if the prosecutors manage to convince the judge that she was, indeed, aware of the fact that she had no right to be back on the road, she will be sent to prison. No questions asked, no mercy, no nothing. The 'fantasy princess' will spend 90 days of her precious time staring at walls and bars. Now, if she's lucky, maybe she will be joined by fellow 'thespian' Nicole Richie. They could, like, do a new episode of 'The Simple Life' called 'Life Behind Bars' or something... I bet that would raise ratings to never before seen scores.

But let us not rush ahead for nothing: there is a big IF in all of this and I have my money on that Paris won't even get to see the inside of a cell. It's sad but nonetheless true...