Instead of looking silly on stage, why not get proper wedge monitoring as rockers do?

Dec 3, 2007 09:53 GMT  ·  By

Well, what's the worst in a live performance? A lousy band making all sorts of mistakes is crappy as hell, of course, but what's really the "worsest" thing of them all? My vision of this nightmare is a singer who's out of tune... and I guess you'll agree with me on this one: there is nothing crappier in the whole wide world than singers who go astray from what they should actually be singing.

Now, this nasty problem can have a multitude of causes, from "deaf" singers who do the "singing" because they are hedonists and want people to see them onstage to health conditions or...improper monitoring. You don't have to be singing at the Wacken Open Air to need monitoring; even as you hum in your shower, you're actually monitoring your singing in an uncontrolled manner, mostly without you noticing this... you hear your own voice and make the necessary "adjustments" so that your "O sole mio" does not sound like the screams of Britney being chased by cannibals.

Well, if you can easily hear yourself in the shower, in the studio or on a stage, this will not happen; and if you can't hear yourself properly, there are serious chances you go "britney" and wreck the show. Poor monitoring also makes singers force their performance so completely futile vocal strain will in time deteriorate the way they actually sing. And even more, if you can't ensure proper monitoring by using floor wedges (as most rockers and serious bands do) and neither do you have an in-ear monitor... there are few choices left. Go on, do your job and try not to fail, go on, screw the audience and sing like Britney or get a Vocal Acoustic Monitor (VAM).

The Vocal Acoustic Monitor will cup your ear and mouth for you, so your hands will be free..we're talking some sort of patent-pending passive monitoring solution that can accommodate almost any microphone, handheld or on a stand. Its creators claim that the Vocal Acoustic Monitor can help singers hear their voice even in very noisy environments like the backstage during warm-up or even on-stage when actually playing.

The VAM is a special piece of plastic material that sports a carefully studied shape, easily conducting the sound of your voice to your ear and letting you better control your voice. For those into stylish gear, I'll add that the Vocal Acoustic Monitor comes in clear, black carbon fiber, red carbon fiber and wood burl finishes, so you get a neater look. For prices around $30-$40, you could give it a try and see what this thing is all about...

Well now, if in the studio you're all alone with your band and the producers/engineers, as you think of playing on a serious stage, the VAM would look a bit silly, IMHO. Way sillier, that is. Nevertheless, if it was for me to choose between singing like this and singing on a microphone with a heat-crippled spatula, I guess I'd rather choose the silly look.

My final question is: why would any serious singer choose a VMA over a good sound engineer and proper floor/sidefill monitoring?

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Carbon fiber-look monitors
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