The Pink Stinger throws 50,000 volts cotton tampons

May 1, 2007 15:46 GMT  ·  By

Here are some typical blogger assertions you probably often ran into. First, the mass media propaganda induces fear among the public. Secondly, people are starting to see more threats. And when mammals like us feel insecure and threatened by something, they grab whatever they might find near and start displacing the matter.

Feeling insecure? Welcome to the cotton tampon fight club! Grab this: the tampon taser gun. Oh my God! A lethal hygienic gun, is this what I'm reading (err, writing)? Oh, it just looks like a tampon. Phew. Good news! The Pink Stinger is definitely going into the purse (pink purse that is).

The Pink Stinger is an advanced taser gun that packs 50,000 volts. Here's how it works. When the "victim" pushes a button, 2 extra cotton tampons with barbed probes and 14 feet long wires are thrown at the aggressor. If it hits the target, it causes the attacked person's central nervous system disruption. There's also another way of "shooting" people. The owner can also shoot out 2 prods for an effective shock that could lead to disoriented, demoralized and (pre-sorry) possible urination.

It also comes with a fresh floral scent that is purported to eliminate the smell of fear (technology, eh?). So, this probably means the ladies will be safe from aggressive dogs that can smell fear.

The next time you see a nervous lady checking her purse and grabbing something pink, maybe you should make sure she's not holding a pink panther action figure in her hands.

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