The Finest Sex Toys Money Can Buy

I must say, I've been looking forward to this day pretty much ever since I was born, and now that it's finally here, it's all I can do to stop myself from shouting about it to pretty much everyone I meet in the street. OK, I might be exaggerating just a tiny bit, but nevertheless, you must share some of my excitement – at least a tiny bit! So I'm just going to come out and say it: my favorite glamor model of all time and classiest British sex bomb to date Jordan is coming out with her own line of sex toys. Yay! I mean, finally, the formerly big-busted Brit is doing... that is, endorsing something that really fits in with her image and true potential.

I mean, remember all those times when we were wondering "why would Jordan waste time pretending to write books about herself when it's pretty clear literature is NOT what she's best at"? Now all that is history, and I can rest peaceful at night knowing that Katie Price (busty Jordan's real name) is not wasting her true potential writing, when in fact she could be coming up with new, revolutionary sex toy designs. "Glamor girl Jordan is aiming to bring out her own range of condoms and sex toys. The goods, including vibrators and massage devices, will have a logo featuring the busty model’s naked silhouette" reports British tabloid The Sun. Well, as I was saying, there's no person in this world I could think of who could better endorse a range of sex toys. Well, except maybe that luscious beauty that goes by the name of CoCo, but I'll have to consider the matter more carefully.

The fact is, I trust Jordan to bring her own creativity to this... ahem, project. You know, that extremely rich imagination of hers and her unique sense of style – the same deadly combination that made her go on record to talk about how her husband's penis is the size of a TV remote control. Well, Jordan could include a measure-your-own-penis vibrators kit in her line of sex toys. And how about a "Peter Andre remote vibrator"? Now that sounds just great. I'm sure people from around the world will line up outside Britain's finest sex shops in order to get their hands on Jordan's range of goodies. I'm thinking of pre-ordering mine. Would that be a good idea?


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