The 2013 Kardashian Christmas Card Is Out, See It Here

Male partners are notably absent, except for Bruce Jenner

By on December 2nd, 2013 13:49 GMT

Each year, the Kardashians release a family Christmas card that, most often than not, is torn apart by celebrity pundits and gossip lovers. Chances are the same will happen with this one, which you can see attached to this article, though not in high-res yet.

Yesterday, Sunday, December 1, 2013, E! aired a Christmas special with the Kardashians, a trailer for which you will find embedded below, at the end of the article.

With the Kristmas Kard now out, holiday season can officially begin. Or, at the very least, those who take pleasure in laughing at their expense can do so with a good reason.

Because, let’s be honest, the Kard is as ridiculous as we’ve come to expect from these reality stars. Set in a post-apocalyptic casino, where fallen statues, torn magazines with the Kardashians’ faces on them, and graffiti abound, the card is, save for one exception, all about the Kardashian-Jenner ladies – photoshopped almost into oblivion, but still recognizable.

On the stairs right there next to the huge dollar sign, we have Kim Kardashian wearing a daring black dress with a keyhole cleavage and super wild hair.

In the middle, we have Kylie and Kendall strike their best model poses, also in black dresses but with crazy headpieces. Next to them, on a broken sofa is Khloe in a mini dress and hair almost as big as Kim’s, with nephew Mason by her side.

Right behind her is Kourtney holding daughter Penelope. You must have noticed already that her partner and the father of her two children, “Lord” Scott Disick is nowhere in sight. Neither is Lamar Odom, Khloe’s husband, and this is bound to add even more fuel to the rumors that their marriage is in the gutter completely and a divorce is imminent.

Perched on the counter of a cashier booth is Kris Jenner, with her skirt riding high to show off her long legs and what looks like a Cleopatra-inspired headpiece. If you look closely, you will notice that Bruce Jenner, her estranged husband, is in the glass “tube” behind her, with his hands pressed to the glass. She must’ve locked him there.

Also absent from the Kard, a David LaChapelle creation, are Kanye West, Kim’s fiancé and baby daddy, and their daughter North West, aka Nori.

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