It's summer. Well, not everywhere, but in Miami it sure is hot! All this global warming is good for the paparazzi, and for us, the voyeuristic audience, as all the stars and would-be-celebrities go out in the sun playing. Speaking of would-be celebs, after her sex-tape scandal, which she officially won, and which made her very rich, Kim Kardashian can also afford to go out in the sun and get some natural tan, for a change.

For those of you who live under a rock, she got $5 million from Vivid Video in an out-of court settlement. This sounds rather dubious, and would make even those of us who are not conspiracy theorists, think about some media stunt, Paris Hilton style. She learned from the best, I might add. And so, the daughter of Robert Kardashian (who defended O.J. Simpson), claims the tape would embarrass the family more than her lies and statements for the media (ummm...and maybe her clothing style). Yeah...sure! Also, in an interview for Complex magazine, she said she was sorry she lied about the videotape, but the whole golden shower thing is absolutely not true! Oh, wait, she said the same about the tape, back in February.

Well, getting back to the present, I mentioned she went out for a swim these past few days, and the paparazzi got a few shots with her, at the beach, in the water, wearing a ton of jewels. Oh my, Kim, is that what you bought from Vivid's money? Shallow....

After seeing these pictures from the beach, some people started wandering where the sharks are since, by tradition, these nasty fishes are attracted to all shiny things. Well I can tell you two things about sharks: for once, they don't eat silicon (if she has, we don't know) and, furthermore, they want a tasty, juicy, fat snack, so they were probably after Coco Nicole Austin, who also tried to take a swim but remembered that she has to stay close to the shores if she wants to appear in the papers.

As a final note, if you're a total masochist, and want to get a quick and painful headache, you should visit Kim's MySpace profile, so charmingly entitled "Kim's a princess". I might add, a golden princess. Don't shoot, I just don't like the girl, it's not my fault she has no style!