She-Pilgrims in High Heels Feed People Tofurky Roasts

The girls want the people in Buffalo to not eat meat this Thanksgiving

On Monday, November 19, the people living in Buffalo will get the chance to try out tofurky roasts (i.e. the animal-friendly version of the run-off-the-mill and mouthwatering stuffed turkey).

This is because two she-pilgrims wearing high heels will be standing at the southeast corner of Eagle and Franklin, hoping that their “anything-but-puritanical” outfits will help draw in the crowds, who will later on be persuaded that eating meat is a crime against animal rights.

“Thanksgiving is murder on turkeys. With fabulous faux fowl, you can celebrate without causing suffering—and give a bird something to be thankful for,” pilgrim wanna-be and PETA member Leila Sleiman says.

According to said green-oriented organization, Thanksgiving turkeys are forced to spend most of their lives in filthy enclosures, which is why some of them end up dying of a heart attack long before somebody even thinks about turning them into a roast.

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