Did you ever think you'd live to see the day when a lady would complain about the size of Brad Pitt's manhood? No, really - it's Brad Pitt, for Pete's sake, the sex god, the sex symbol, the man with more testosterone and more sex appeal than a Saturday night meeting of half-naked football hunks out for a beer and some male bonding. The outrage! The scandal! However, we must trust Juliette Lewis' word, since she actually dated Brad and got much more up close and personal with all his body parts that 99.99% of us ever will. And even if she may have been exaggerating - it's a huge offense anyway. Insulting the masculinity of one of the most manly men out there is not, under any circumstance, something that has to be dealt with lightly.
As for Juliette - well, it's not like her career has been too spectacular, and as far as media attention is concerned, she never did do anything more spectacular than date The Brad (something that happened in the early 90s anyway). Apart from some minor roles in a couple of comedies and the leading part in Oliver Stone's "Natural Born Killers", there's not too much to say about her input in the movie world - but she has found popularity and public appreciation as the lead singer of punk band "Juliette and The Licks". Don't get me wrong - when I say "popularity" I mean it in a slightly "Beth Ditto"-ish way, with wild, half-dressed stage appearances.
So back to Brad's little Brad. Juliette, it seems, had just played a gig at a club called Chop Suey in Seattle and, while she was treating herself with some after-party mingling at the bar, a fan reportedly asked "Hey, Juliette, how was Brad Pitt in the sack anyway?" The reply came after a few seconds of pondering the issue (probably trying hard to remember and sound polite at the same time): "He was no BIG deal, if ya know what I mean!" The National Enquirer reports that "as Juliette turned to head back on stage, the guy yelled: "Are you saying Brad was the PITTS?" Juliette started laughing so hysterically she banged into a table and sent everyone's drinks flying".
Well, at least Juliette had fun. I have a feeling a couple of other people (Brad most prominent among them) won't be having as much fun with this thing - but who cares, it's a good laugh on a Saturday morning. So, let's enjoy it and wait for Brad's reply. Although, really, I'm not getting my hopes up too much. He's such a goody-goody, Mr. Nice guy that all he'll probably say is "I'm afraid it's not quite so". Boring.
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