The secret to American Idol still being so popular after so many seasons is partly due to the stars that make up the panel of judges, it has often been said, and especially the chemistry they share. Paula Abdul is one of the most colorful and spontaneous presences on television, but that is not to say that she doesn’t know what it’s like to have it rough, as she reveals for the latest edition of
Ladies’ Home Journal.
Rumors about Paula being on some sort of medication have often circulated in the media, but they were rubbished each time by the star herself, who insisted she was only taking muscle relaxants for the injuries she sustained in her youth. Now, with the upcoming issue of the mag, Abdul sets the record straight: she was addicted to painkillers and has been to a rehab clinic. Fortunately, she is now clean and sober – but the trip here almost cost her her life.
“I could have killed myself. Withdrawal – it’s the worst thing.” the 46-year-old singer and television personality says for Ladies’ Home Journal. Last Thanksgiving, Paula admitted herself to the La Costa Resort and Spa in California, to seek professional help for her painkiller medication abuse. “I was freezing cold, then sweating hot, then chattering and in so much pain, it was excruciating. But at my very core, I did not like existing the way I had been.” the star explains.
The pills were all prescription ones, the American Idol judge insists. As fans must know, Abdul, once the highest-rated dancer and cheerleader, sustained a serious back injury at just 17 and then another one, equally grave, during a plane crash in 1993. This, combined with her desire to work non-stop and her determination to not let anyone see just in how much pain she was, led to her abusing the medication her doctors had prescribed. In time, this turned into a habit, which often made her act “weird,” as Paula herself puts it.
Skeptics always said that it was Abdul’s pill-popping ways that made her and fellow judge Simon Cowell jump at each other’s throat in almost every episode of the show. Not so much, the singer now explains. “He’s like the brother I never had – or wanted. From day one, Simon and I have had a love-hate relationship.” Paula says. However, things have changed on American Idol too, since now she’s not alone after the arrival of Kara DioGuardi. “It’s a boys’ club no more. Now, it’s
a sisterhood with Kara, and we’re having a blast.” Abdul adds, shooting down rumors that she and Kara are actually enemies trying to push each other out of the popular show.