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Our Porn Queen Is Officially DunzoJenna Jameson is airborne now... |
By Elena Gorgan, Entertainment News Editor
15th of August 2007, 13:55 GMT
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I know you're probably sick of hearing about Jenna Jameson losing weight and looking like her lost twin sister who passed away ten years ago and was unfortunate enough not to be buried in the ground... After all, why is she that important for us to keep a close eye on her, just to see that she lost another pound (better make that another ten pounds) or that she AGAIN did something to her face, some intervention that she shouldn't have had.
But that would mean being completely oblivious to Jenna's importance to our modern culture (and I'm totally saying this with a straight face). Like it or not, Jenna is often acknowledged as the woman who, via her movies, managed to introduce porn into mainstream culture. And that's a rather huge feat for a tiny girl with big dreams and even bigger boobs. Again, if such a thing was good or bad, it's entirely up to you to decide. As far as I'm concerned, all things happen for a reason...
Well... about that last part. There are a few things in this world that happen without a good reason, like Paris Hilton existing, Britney Spears continuing to bask in the spotlight and Lindsay Lohan being her own driver. You know, things of little importance. But this one I'm gonna talk about today is a major deal, even if there's no logic behind it: Jenna Jameson's body and the way it has begun to slowly (but very surely) disappear in front of our very eyes.
I found these recent photos of Jenna at the beach, making faces and trying to be sexy for a photo shoot. She failed at that last part. Aside from the obvious question 'do people still contact her for work?', there is yet another one that is burned in my brains: WTF? Like... really, what the ... ? (do pardon my French, please) Is Jenna blind, are all the mirrors in her house gone, has she no more friends to tell her that she looks more like the Nicole Richie of last year, instead of her old lusty, curvy and extremely sexy (in that pornish way she had about her) self of old days?
I know she's been going through a nasty divorce and all, but that was, like, months ago. Well, I'm not questioning her right to grieve, or whatever she's feeling right now, but is she not aware that she's beginning to lose the one thing that keeps her floating and in the limelight - namely, her body? And don't even try to tell me that she's also intelligent and smart and stuff (even if she really is), because you known only too well that you couldn't care less if she was able to extract the square root of 1,693 in one millisecond. It's the boobies, baby, and everything that she does with them (plus other parts of her body) that are the main attractions for everybody!
Frankly, I don't know what more I could say, save that Jenna looks like a duck trying to signal the rest of her flock. Or like she's levitating. Or as if she's trying to do her best imitation of a bikini-clad, washed ashore, artificially tanned skeleton. With boobs. And tape to keep them boys (or girls, whatevs) together and avoid falling down to her knees. And, honestly, it's beyond painful...
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