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Oh, Joy: Paris Hilton Is Naked Again...

The heiress bares it all for a can of champagne

By Monica Gaza, Entertainment News Editor

12th of December 2007, 11:23 GMT

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Why? I mean, really, why? Why does Paris Hilton believe that when all hope fades (which means, whenever she's not getting enough media attention as she believes she deserves) the wise thing to do is to burn a naked image of herself into our unsuspecting retinas - again? Why do we have to live in a world in which some people actually think Paris is sexy? Whoever told Paris that the world is dying to see her naked is either deluded or hates the heiress' guts - or maybe it's just someone who gets their kicks out of watching people suffer severe burns to the eyes after watching the latest add featuring the blond strip naked.

The fact is, I know for sure that when it comes to Paris, clothes are not fashion accessories, they are in fact nature's invention to protect the rest of the world from having too close a look at Paris' body. And to be blunt, I think most of us saw just about everything she has to offer in terms of nudity and the likes - seeing how she does have a sex tape out, after all - let's not forget that, OK? This time, however, Paris is trying to promote a refined, sexy image of herself - by advertising one of the greatest inventions of this century: Rich Prosecco, which is a brand of canned champagne.

Yes, you heard me. There is such a thing as canned champagne, and who better to promote it than Paris herself, covered in gold paint and crawling through what looks like the Mojave Desert. Other than that, you can observe the classic "Paris having an orgasm" pose: eyes closed, head bent backwards, boobs to the front. In fact, I think someone needs to check if there really was a photo shoot for this so-called ad campaign, or whether they just took a still image off Paris' sex tape, photoshopped some gold paint all over and used it to promote the champaign I was telling you about.

And even if this is not put together from the sex tape we all know and love, I'm not sure what the concept behind this ad campaign is. "Paris Hilton is like a can of champagne - a bad idea overall". Yes, that's gotta be it. And what's with the near-orgasm look on Paris' face? Oh, that's right - there's no champagne can in sight in the photo, so it's down to our imagination to come up with possible ideas for where the can in question is stuffed.

TAGS:

Paris Hilton | champagne | naked | ad | golden paint

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