Brit Brit is pretty much like the sun or the moon. No, no, I'm not actually paying her a compliment, I'm just thinking of an effective comparison and the sun was the only thing that came to mind. I mean, we know for sure when it's going to rise, and with just as much precision we also know that every day there's going to be a Britney disaster in the making. Either it's Britney burning down her house (I know she hasn't done that yet, but I can see it coming... thank heaven she doesn't have her kids living with her anymore), Britney taking her kids hostage or Britney having a meltdown in front of the gate that leads to her house, there's always something. I have been trying hard to think of something else in my life that's as reliable as Britney's daily crazy antics, but there's really no such thing. Lucky me, I suppose...
The heart of the matter is that Britney is as crazy as a... [insert your animal of choice here - I'm going with "bat"] and just as unpredictable. I mean, every day we all know that she WILL manifest herself in a way that's completely outrageous (not to mention annoying as hell) but still, she does manage to surprise us. It's like a piece of chewing gum that acquires a new taste every single day. Well, then, what is it this time, you'll ask? This time, Brit Brit took her new car - a Mercedes Benz SLK 350 - out for a spin by herself, and ended up having to rely on her best friends the paparazzi for help. In short, Brit decided to take up one photographer's advice and take a shortcut to get back to her Mulholland Drive home in the Summit, but as she was trying to turn the car around, she soon stopped and complained that she was scared, dizzy and afraid that she would drive off a cliff. Which wasn't the case, of course, but hey, since this is Britney... anything goes.
Once the paparazzi helped her turn her car around, she demanded that one of them come home with her. I have no idea what for, but I suppose she's not very clear on that either. The fact is, it's all in a day's work for the Britster, and boy, does she make a good job of it. Plus, there's the added bonus that when put next to Britney, the most annoying people in our lives, our crazy aunts, bosses or spouses suddenly seem like nice, well-adjusted people. If there's one thing I know, it's that the Britney crazy train never disappoints and never stops. So rest assured that tomorrow is another day, and I'll be writing yet another post in which we'll be discussing the popwreck's antics. What was I telling you - just like the sun. Or the moon. Your choice.
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