Mine Is Better Than Yours...

It seems that the baby race has gotten to a new level of craziness - and no, it's not a joke or some more news about half a dozen more A-list celebrities being pregnant. No, this time it's all about the popularity of celebrity babies who are already part of our ever-changing world - more specifically, about Nicole Richie and Christina Aguilera's newborn kids. It's common knowledge that both these famous ladies (famous for different reasons, let's make that clear) graced the cover of People magazine with their respective kids, thus introducing them both to the world via the same gate, so to say. Well, you know what that means, right? No, I'm not talking about the emotional side but about the purely cold, commercial side of things.

That's right: given the fact that both Nicole and Christina were featured on the cover of People, it was easy to draw a comparison and see who sold the most covers. And the winner is... drum roll, please... Nicole Richie. It doesn't make sense to me, since Christina is definitely the bigger, more talented star - but as always, People has an explanation for this. "Christina historically doesn't do that well on covers", an inside source reveals. "There's also a greater element of curiosity with Nicole", the source further explained. "She's gone public about being a heroin addict. Her boyfriend is covered in tattoos. By default, she's got the more interesting baby. People want to see how she settles down. They want to see what kind of baby someone with her background has".

Well, here's an idea: I think Christina (who, I believe, will be mightily pissed off about this) should challenge Nicole to a "baby face-off". Both ladies should try to make their newborns more interesting and thus increase their public appeal. I don't know, tattoo the poor kids, paint their faces red and yellow, pierce their ears and only use purple and green striped diapers. Also, they could buy them golden toys, feed them from diamond-encrusted bottles and create MySpace and Facebook accounts for them, you know, just to make sure they have a solid fan base by the time they stop wetting themselves.