Shane Watson on how 40+ women can still get their Mr. Right

Jan 22, 2009 21:01 GMT  ·  By
Actress Julianne Moore is in her late ‘40s, and one of Hollywood’s most exquisite beauties
   Actress Julianne Moore is in her late ‘40s, and one of Hollywood’s most exquisite beauties

Statistically speaking, once a woman crosses the 40-year threshold, she might as well completely take her mind off marriage. Even with the emancipation of women, what with them being more independent of men both financially and psychologically, figures still speak volumes about their odds at marriage: after the big 4-0, there is only a 2.6 chance of them walking down the altar with Mr. Right. Writer Shane Watson, though, is an exception and, what’s most important, she wants to “instruct” other women as how to behave to increase their chances.

Writing for the British Daily Mail, Mrs. Watson recalls how she, until not long a determined singleton, found the love of her life and exchanged “I Do’s” with him in his early ‘40s. Therefore, she concludes, statistics are, at the end of the day, just numbers, and there is nothing stopping women from all over the world from doing their best to prevent being included in such figures – wherefrom the determination to pen her upcoming book, targeting specifically this age segment of the female population.

Watson’s book was inspired, as per her own admission, not only from her own experience with men and age, but was also highly influenced by what she saw in her friends. Not meeting the right man after a certain age, she says in more words, is merely a matter of the attitude of the woman in question. Thus, it is this attitude she must pay attention to, and this refers not only to how she’s around others, but also to the way in which she sees herself. However, it’s the former aspect that plays the utmost importance, Watson concludes.

One of the first things that Mrs. Watson stresses is that women over 40 have to stop trying to be divas, or to act as such. Divas, as a rule, are not always loved, and perhaps this could explain why men don’t virtually queue up for a date with them. “The trouble with being single for over a year is that you start to get Try Hard paranoia,” Mrs. Watson says.

“You think, I am perfectly happy with my life and, what’s more, I am extremely keen that no one should mistake me for a sad single person on the pull. On no account do I want anyone at a party / in the restaurant / on the street / the taxi driver / a passing satellite to think I am trying to get a man. […] This […] attitude is not just unhealthy, it will give men the impression that you want to be left alone. If you are determined that no one should mistake you for a woman who might be looking for a man, then don’t be surprised if no one comes looking for you.” an excerpt from Mrs. Watson’s upcoming book reads.

On that note, Mrs. Watson assures her readers that, if they just follow the above tip along with several others (on how to behave on a date, how to avoid being too controlling, and how to boost self-confidence), marriage after 40 stops being a statistic and turns real. “If it could happen to me, it can definitely happen to you.” she concludes by saying.