Supermodel recalls difficult start in the industry in very revealing book

Nov 1, 2012 08:34 GMT  ·  By

Kate Moss rarely does in-depth interviews, often saying she likes to keep some things to herself, especially if they concern only her. In her new book, excerpts of which are published in the latest issue of Vanity Fair, Kate talks about the breakdown she had when she first started in the industry.

Few are those with an eye for fashion who don’t know of Kate Moss’ famous (and infamous, at the time) Calvin Klein ad from 1992, which showed a then 17-year-old Kate straddling Mark Wahlberg.

In her book, Moss admits the attention that came with the CK campaign, as well as the fact that posing like this did not come naturally to her, pushed her on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

“I had a nervous breakdown when I was 17 or 18, when I had to go and work with Marky Mark and Herb Ritts. It didn’t feel like me at all. I felt really bad about straddling this buff guy. I didn’t like it,” Kate says.

“I couldn’t get out of bed for two weeks. I thought I was going to die. I went to the doctor, and he said, ‘I’ll give you some Valium,’ and Francesca Sorrenti, thank God, said, ‘You’re not taking that’,” the model recalls.

“It was just anxiety. Nobody takes care of you mentally. It was just really weird – a stretch limo coming to pick you up from work. I didn’t like it. But it was work, and I had to do it,” she says.

On the same note, Moss notes that the confident girl people got to see in photos back then wasn’t really her, but a character she would play for the camera.

Still a teen, Kate was very insecure about her looks, lacking a positive body image, but she had to always act like she was the most confident.

“So I’d lock myself in the toilet and cry and then come out and do it,” she says of how she came to cope with the situation. “I never felt very comfortable about it. There’s a lot of [breasts]. I hated my [breasts]! Because I was flat-chested.”

More here.