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Jordan: The Boobs Are Kaput!The nose doesn't look so hot, either |
By Monica Gaza, Entertainment News Editor
10th of January 2008, 15:40 GMT
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If I were to think about Jordan, this modern-day British Pamela Anderson with the heart of silicone and the mind set on nothing but personal gain, the first thing that would come to mind would not be a proper thought, but a visual of her cartoon-like massive boobs, which have become somehow trademark of the glamor model. I don't know what's been going on lately in the world of the rich and famous ladies on both sides of the Atlantic, but the main trends at the moment are getting pregnant and making radical changes to your look. And boy, have we witnessed some pretty spectacular moves! I'll only remind you of Amy Winehouse dissing her trademark black beehive for a bleached blonde look - before coming back to Jordan, or Katie Price, whatever you choose to call her. Well, Jordan has apparently decided to update her looks too, and proceeded to getting under the knife.
What came out? A Jordan with significantly decreased cup size, a nose job and lots of various chemicals injected in strategic places in her body, from her forehead to her lips. OK, rewind - it's official, and we can get those tissues ready and start crying. Jordan has dissed her massive boobs, and reportedly went form size 32FF to a tame 32F. Apparently, the breast reduction surgery was a Christmas gift from her hubby Peter Andre. Now if this is true,
I only have two major questions to ask: first, Peter Andre still actually has money left? And secondly, what was he thinking? Was he jealous of all the attention his wife's boobs were getting and wanted them out of the way so that he could get some media lovin' too? Or was he concerned for her health and thought giving yourself such a hugely inflated chest was a stupid thing to do? My guess is it wasn't either of those two - but who knows, I may very well be wrong.
The fact is, the queen of kitsch is definitely dunzo, and in her place she seems to be trying to build a new, more sophisticated version of herself. Does Jordan really feel she has grown old enough to need such a radical step towards a more stylish self? Or is this simply a strategy to help prepare the stage for her little sister Sophia, who is ready to do whatever it takes in order to step into her older sister's boobs... I mean, fill her shoes and become just as annoying and just as, ahem, famous. Well, I don't know about Amy Winehouse going blonde, but I do have a bad feeling about Jordan going cup D. She may end up agreeing with me, but I give her time - time to see her endorsement deals and overall income plummet. And then we'll talk some more.
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