Jessica Sierra: Sex Tape AND Baby Coming Up!

Remember Jessica Sierra? That's right, the drugged-out American Idol finalist who... well, didn't win American Idol but sure knew how to make herself famous – and fast. This lovely lady is currently sitting on her pretty a*s in jail, where she ended up for being a very naughty girl. She's charged with parole violation, disorderly intoxication and resisting arrest without violence – among other things, and is of course looking at a promising career as trainwreck, porn queen and crack-head extraordinaire. If she manages to keep herself out of jail, that is, and not get the 11 years in the slammer she's risking for her parole violation. You'll ask yourself – could there be any good news for this lady right about now? Well, believe it or not, there is.

Jessica Sierra, everybody, is pregnant. Can you believe that? No, I'm not kidding you and no, it's not a rumor. I mean, it couldn't possibly have been a joke, because it's not making anybody laugh. Cry, maybe – but not laugh. Anyway, the fact is Jessica seems to have become contaminated with the pregnancy mania that's been sweeping through Hollywood lately, although in her case I'm sure it was less of a "fortunate accident" and more the result of a drunken binge – since the father has only been identified as "a rapper". Jessica is currently resting comfortably in the infirmary of the Falkenburg Road Jail in Florida and is said to be on a special "pregnancy diet".

Well, the fact is I don't envy her kid. Just think of what the poor thing will have to deal with when he or she grows up. Mommy's sex tape, for once – since I hope you haven't forgotten that Jessica was kind enough to let herself caught on video doing the nasty with some unknown partner before the whole baby drama started. This tape is not only real – but was also purchased by a major adult movie production company which is planning to release it quite soon. And then we'll be seeing Jessica in the hall of fame alongside the likes of Paris, Pammy and other glorious representatives of the sex-tape genre – and see what she's really made of. And secondly, by the looks of things, mommy-to-be Jessica Sierra will not have an easy time even if she somehow manages to keep herself out of jail. So, brace yourselves – and stay tuned for more news.


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