If You're a Britney Fan, You'll End Up LIKE THIS!

The Britster's disastrous performance at the VMAs sparked some serious controversy - and if people on this planet weren't already deeply divided by serious matters such as faith, money and sexual orientation (not necessarily in that order), it looks like there's a fresh reason now for heated exchanges and tearful protests. To cut a long story short, the reason in question is - you guessed it - Britney. Yes, the blonde bomb strikes again - and as usual, it's below the belt.

And there was me thinking it was all going to be funny. Making fun of Britney after the VMAs. Well, maybe there was some fun in watching the former pop princess make a fool of herself and definitively tanking her career - but for some of us pity outranked disgust. And for the persistent and perseverant Britney fans (yes, it seems that they're not as extinct as we believe them to be) it's all been pretty much a catastrophe that made them stick together and discover new virtues of their idol.

Just check out the video below. It will either make you laugh hysterically, or make you go "what the hell" and then start venting all sorts of conspiracy theories. Like for example the fact that the Britster's shocking performance was in fact caused by the fact that she heard comedian Sarah Silverman rehearsing her on-stage dialogue (and having a go at her) before the show kicked off. Which, some would tell you, scared our little princess s**tless and made her extremely nervous about performing.

Another option is that MTV officials have put Britney on stage knowing she was going to tank - and just used her as live bait, making it fair game for everyone to take a bite of her. And finally, MTV officials sabotaged Criss Angel and didn't allow him to help Britney out because...well, no reason for this one, probably (says Britney fan lore) because they're just mean and vengeful.

The thing is, rooting our for Britney can cause serious health concerns - known signs and symptoms include hysteria, crying desperately, swearing and making yourself go crazy enough to post a video of yourself online, just so that the world (Britney included) knows what you've been through and just what an exceptional person Brit Brit really is. So, I suppose the bad lip-synching, the excess of fat and the lazy strolling around from one end of the stage to the other were just figments of our imagination? But hey, I may have been brainwashed by the MTV and made to believe her performance sucked - it's a bad, bad world out there, people. So beware.