14 DAY TRIAL // In a new interview on the message of the song and video “Judas,” Lady Gaga’s most recent controversial release, the singer talks about fame, family and whether she sees herself as an icon or not.
Given that she’s accomplished more in a few years than countless other artists accomplish in a lifetime, Gaga is still pretty much in shock as regards her success and how famous she is.
She tells E! Online that she can hardly believe three years ago she was still a nobody no one wanted to hear sing, and that she couldn’t get a lucky break no matter how hard she tried and worked for it.
Now that she finally has a platform from which she can make herself heard, Gaga’s only fear is that she will not have the time to make the utmost use of it.
“In a lot of ways I’m really delusional about my success, and sometimes I feel like an underdog in so many ways,” she says, echoing what she said in a previous interview about still feeling like “a loser kid in high school.”
“My biggest fear is that I’ll die before I get all my ideas out. I have nightmares about it. I have recurring nightmares where I’m late, I’m late to turn something in,” she adds.
Because her life has changed so much over such a short period of time, Gaga can’t estimate what will happen in the future; neither can she say whether she sees herself doing the same thing as today 10 years from now.
For all she knows, she could be preparing for the wedding, with a bun in the oven, she jokes.
“I could never explain to you the amazing life-changing experience that has been the last three years of my life. I was in New York City singing in bars, busting my [expletive] and nobody believed in me. And all of a sudden I have to catch a plane to sing for 60,000 people in Guadalajara. I can’t even conceive of it,” she says.
Her family remains unimpressed by all the success she’s been having for the past years, but she believes part of that is down to them not fully understanding the message.
One thing Gaga knows is that she’s not an icon, as some media outlets have already rushed to call her.
“I believe it takes a lot of time. The definition of iconography is repetition of imagery, I haven’t been around long enough yet. Give me at least 10 more years,” she says.
For the full interview, including a lengthy explanation of “Judas,” please see here.