Hillary Duff on the "No Underwear" List

I've started making a list with all the things that a hot young (pseudo, would-be, ex) celebrity must totally have and do this year. Honestly, I'm gonna write myself a nice checklist and stick it on the fridge door and whenever fresh gossip comes out about one of the young starlets or fashionistas or celebutantes or socialites or however else we choose to call them, instead of writing a column I'm gonna just take up my marker and do a nice red tick in a box. It's not that I want to save time. No, nothing of the sort - I just think it's all part of a big mean plot to Britney-fy and Lindsay-fy us all and I want to have enough proof to go live on David Letterman and convince you all that the end is near. Kidding.

But I did mean the part about the checklist. The number one thing's definitely gotta be drugs - and booze, plenty of both, and then - drums roll, please - comes the stripping off your underwear part. And just so that I'm totally proven right, Hillary Duff has apparently decided to step into the shoes of veteran walking blunders such as Britney or Lindsay Lohan and did a "play in Vegas with no panties on" act just this weekend.

As you can see (well, you can't actually and we can't show you, but you sort of get the general picture) dear Hillary's on stage in a slutty outfit she's already worn once before quite recently, and it's all going good for her only...ooops, as the camera pans to an unfortunate upwards angle we get to see that the sexy blonde has either 1. run out of underwear money or 2. completely forgotten to stop by the underwear drawer and choose a pair or 3. put on a pair of transparent, invisible undies.

And while the thing in itself is totally gross, I do wonder if this is some sort of fashion statement aimed to get her in some sort of secret sorority whose members show off their coochies, paint fake tattoos around their nipples and either get pregnant or arrested for DUI before they turn 25. If Hillary starts hanging out with Paris Hilton next, we'll know what to think - and I'll definitely be ticking another box on my checklist, just for spite.