Dead Mouse Doherty

Dear me, the world of heartbreaks and disappointments sure is a strange place when it comes to rockers and their sense of tragedy. I mean, there is definitely something very bad: either wrong with them, or with my perception of what it means to suffer from a tough breakup. I got it - it must be something about the drugs. Yes, breaking up with someone with whom you used to do drugs must be a separate kind of hell altogether. I mean, if Moss had split up with a nice, normal guy instead of crackpot Doherty, I'm sure she would not have acquired the allure of such a dark, inspirational muse.

But unfortunately she did date Doherty, she even did drugs with him and the poor guy is now in so much pain - especially since Kate seems to have moved on and has a new man to play with - that he started resorting to all sorts of desperately impressionistic (or maybe Gothic) tricks to catch her attention. OK, so far we've got Doherty and Moss - enter trainwreck number three, out favorite cleaned-up coke-head Courtney Love, who - it seems - is not only Doherty's potential new woman, she's also a source of perpetual inspiration for him.

And when we say inspiration, we don't mean in terms of drug use - but who knows. No, it's even worse than that. It seems that Love once sent a dead mouse to one of her exes as some sort of reminder of how much she hates him. Joke. No, actually it was supposed to be a symbol of how hurt she was when he left her. Don't look at me - I find that bizarre. No, worse than that - I find it disgusting. I'm the type that likes to shred a guy's photo and then burn it in the fireplace and that's my anger over with. But this may mean I was not born an artist, like some of the boys and girls out there.

And of course Doherty chose to copy love - and sent his ex girl Moss a dead mouse too. And of course there was an idiot who chose to stand up for Doherty and speak in his defense - and here's what he has to say. "Some people might find it disgusting but it's still art, if in its extreme sense. Nobody balks when Damien Hirst puts a shark in formaldehyde and this is very similar. It's become the latest outlandish fashion statement in Manhattan but Pete is trying to emphasize how he feels without Kate - defeated, crushed and broken, like the dead animal".

Yes, I'm sure Moss saw it the same way. And when I say that, I mean she ignored the dangerous source of a million potential diseases and just hugged the dead mouse tight and never let it go. No really - this is not a fashion statement, it's madness. And Doherty should definitely be locked up in a mental asylum, he's definitely not right in the head - and I'm not even joking this time.