Courtney Love Thinks She's Got a "crazy chop mouth"

Courtney Love realized everyone likes a good confession from time to time - and probably thought we were desperately waiting for hers, so she decided to talk about some of the things in her life - nothing spectacular, just the usual "I was a massive junkie but now I'm clean and I'm just trying to lead an ordinary life" rant. I was just wondering - if a normal, happy, drug-free life is what she needs, how come she's so willing to expose herself to the public eye, gossip and controversy with such ease? The answer, it seems, lies in the question: gossip and controversy make her stories worth buying.

"I know how to play the game now. I have to navigate the system, follow the rules and stop being a rebel. I can't afford to be a 43-year-old rebel" Love says. I think a rebel is a rather mild term in this context, seeing how Love herself claims that, despite being sober for three years (ha! not sure I believe that - or maybe by 'sober' she and the rest of the world mean different things) "it will be another two years before my memory is back to normal" - on account of severe dug abuse.

She also says all the things we'd expect her to say about her life - how she focuses on herself and her career, loves puppies and long walks in the rain. Kidding about the puppies and the walks, but she does mention Buddhist chanting (I'd love to be a fly on the wall and witness that), Pilates and Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, therapy with a drug addiction specialist and being a mother. It's a good thing she remembers her daughter - although not a word of what happened to the kid during all those years of drugs and booze. Pretty sure her daughter will need some serious therapy too at some point.

"I'm really just a Beverly Hills soccer mom who wants to be a real estate mogul and design clothes". Yes, pretty low ambitions I'd say. She also claims she was "goaded and manipulated" into blaming Steve Coogan for Owen Wilson's drug abuse. Yes, I bet those statements about Amy Winehouse being the biggest crack-head in history were also extorted out of her.

Love admits to having had two nose jobs and dental surgery - actually, some of it is so obvious there's really no point whatsoever in denying it - and also a disastrous lip-plumping procedure that gave her a "crazy chop mouth" that she is desperately trying to fix and "restore my face to a natural look" - whatever that means. Her plans for the future also include losing some more weight, designing her own clothing line and having a perfume named after her - but not just yet. "No one wants to smell like Eau du Controversy" she wisely adds. Spot on!