14 DAY TRIAL // Global warming and climate change are bad, scientists and environmentalists alike keep telling us. They foster extreme weather manifestations, and they are a threat to agricultural practices worldwide.
The good news is that brainiacs are working hard on coming up with ways to put a leash on them.
Granted, some of the solutions they have until now come up with are pretty wacky, but given the gravity of the situation, we can't really afford to dismiss any of them.
Hence, perhaps it might not be such a bad idea to take a few moments to ponder on whether or not Kanye West salami could be part of ongoing efforts to limit climate change and global warming.
What exactly is Kanye West salami?
First off, it must be said that Kanye West fans have nothing to fear, as nobody is planning to assassinate the artist and turn him into salami.
On the contrary, all the folks at BiteLabs want to do is get him to willingly give up some of the cells in his body, and use them to grow muscle in the lab.
The final steps are grounding this muscle, mixing it up with spices, oils, and fats, and turning the resulting concoction into salami.
Why would anyone even think about using celebrity meat to make salami?
To get an answer to this question, one need only turn their attention to a paper published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences in December 2013.
According to this paper, livestock has a humongous ecological footprint, and the cows that people raise for meat and milk are by far the worst of the bunch.
More precisely, researchers claim that, according to evidence at hand, cows account for about 77% of the greenhouse gas emissions associated with livestock.
This means that, as tasty as some people might find them, odds are planet Earth is not all that happy about having a whole lot of them walk all over it.
To put it in a nutshell, it would appear that, on a global scale, pigs and birds cough out some 24 kilos and 3.7 kilos of carbon per kilo of edible protein, respectively.
Cows, sheep and goats, have been documented to produce anywhere from 58 – 1,000 kilos of carbon per kilo of edible protein.
Otherwise put, raising animals for food is a rather nasty business that strains the environment and contributes to climate change and global warming.
Consequently, there are a lot of environmentalists out there who are bending over backwards to convince people to eat less meat, maybe even quit consuming it altogether.
The trouble is that, given the fact that many have a sweet tooth for hamburgers, bacon, and other similar treats, the chances that the world's entire population will turn vegan overnight are pretty much slim to none.
This is where lab-grown meat comes in. Thus, scientists say that, by switching to growing meat inside laboratories instead of raising animals in order to obtain it, it would be possible to continue enjoying steaks without harming good old Mother Nature in the process.
I know that lab-grown meat sounds like a load of baloney, but mind you, it's been done. In fact, it was in last year's August when the world's first so-called test-tube burger was cooked and eaten.
So yes, it's all perfectly doable, and turning to this source of nutrients instead of continuing to grow livestock would help protect forests, and also reduce global water and energy consumption.
If PETA is right, having a well-put-together lab-grown meat industry would reduce the current greenhouse gas emissions associated with meat production by a whopping 78-96%.
So where does Kanye West salami factor in?
Truth be told, it is highly unlikely that, even if the celeb were to agree to donate some of his cells for meat production, people would jump at the opportunity to take a bite out of this kind of salami.
Sure, Hannibal Lecter is a rather charismatic character, but then again eating Kanye West salami would be a form of cannibalism, and something tells me not all that many people are down with this practice.
On the other hand, perhaps it might not be such a bad idea if the celebrity were to agree to get behind this initiative, if not to have people eat bits and pieces of him, then in order to help make lab-grown meat a tad more popular that is currently is.
Granted, the lab-grown meat industry is still in its early days, but I for one think that is has a great deal of potential and could use a little more publicity.
In other words, here's how I see things: sure, researchers can go ahead and make Kanye West salami, provided that they get the artist's permission to do so.
However, they shouldn't try to force it down people's throats, but instead use it as a means to inform people about the perks associated with eating meat coming from a laboratory and not from livestock.