14 DAY TRIAL // Dark and difficult times lie ahead of pigeons living in the city of Wooster in Wayne County, Ohio, US. As it turns out, local authorities are determined to meddle in their love life and put them on the pill in a desperate attempt to stop them from having any more poop-dropping babies.
That's right, we're talking birth control for birds. Apparently, this is the best officials in Wayne County could come up with when trying to figure out a way to keep the darn pigeons and their offspring from destroying the local urban landscape simply by, well, relieving themselves on buildings.
Pigeon poop is no joke, authorities say
Reports say that, sometime later this year, the city of Wooster will finally be done reconditioning an 1878 downtown courthouse. The trouble is that, as impressive as this building will look when the restoration work is completed, chances are that local pigeons won't be shy about pooping on it.
Authorities in Ohio's Wayne County fear that the bird droppings will not only make the restored courthouse look less imposing than it should, given all the funds that have so far been invested in reconditioning it, but will also destroy its statues and ornaments.
Looking to solve this problem, local high officials are to have bird experts add birth control pills to the promiscuous pigeons feed. This move will hopefully help reduce the local pigeon population and, consequently, the amount of droppings the birds fire at buildings while soaring through the sky.
The move is expected to yield significant results
In a recent interview, Wayne County Commissioner Ann Obrecht explained that, should all go as planned, the birth control chemicals that officials want to use to spike the meals of pigeons living in Wooster should yield significant results in a fairly short while.
Specifically, the Commissioner argued that, all things considered, having pigeons in this corner of the US more or less willingly go on the pill should help halve their population in about a year after this rather peculiar project is implemented.
One can only hope that, once they lose their interest in romance, the pigeons won't turn to food for comfort. Otherwise, chances are that the birds that will be left to inhabit Wooster will more than make up for their lost companions and offspring as far as droppings production goes.
