Barbie Doll and Her Perfectly Color-Coordinated Ken

You know I simply love Jordan. I mean, I wouldn't be human if I didn't, because I truly believe there is not a single being on this planet that hasn't simply fallen head over heels in love with her. Let's take a moment to think things through a bit: she's beautiful (naturally, I might as well add), talented and always a pleasure to see. What more can one ask from a celebrity? Plus, Jordan is also really important for her contribution to our modern culture and to the shaping of fashion trends.

Aside from being one of the best known (if not actually THE best known) glamour models in the UK, Jordan is also famous for... err... for... wait, I know!... for... her boobies! And her ridiculous way of dressing up as if she were the living incarnation of Barbie. But the funniest part is that she also believes that Peter Andre (you know, the guy with the hard-rock abs who used to sing something about a mysterious girl while slowly, slowly touching his 'irresistible' body) is her Ken. Which is good, in a certain way. But, when Jordan thinks she can color-coordinate ALL her outfits with Peter's, then there's some fun to be had. And that, my dears, is what we're about to do.

You see, Jordan and Peter are now in LA, shooting scenes for their brand new reality show. In case you've been living under a rock until today, they are the second couple to take the US by storm (via a reality show, that is), the first one being, of course, the Beckhams. The glamor model and the 'singer''s series has just been picked up by a major American network and, consequently, they are back to work again, walking around town with a camera crew permanently on their tail.

The first night out, Jordan and Peter went to dinner at Mr. Chow, wearing ridiculous outfits: hers was a body-hugging dress which emphasized even more her gigantic bazookas (and her pregnancy belly, but that's not necessarily a bad thing; actually, it was the only plus to her ensemble), while Mr. Andre was barely breathing in a black vest and white shirt. These two are classy and this yellow matching number can only be seen as an argument to that.

I should say, if you're gonna wear clothes that match your husband's, the least you can do is to be more subtle. I know this Barbie doll thing is kinda cute but let me assure you: it's not THAT cute! Plus, isn't Jordan afraid that she is somehow putting a damper on Peter's masculinity? Oh, yeah, I just saw how that came out and it simply can't be: there isn't any left in that poor man.

Another thing: Jordan announced (again!) a couple of weeks ago that she was going to have her breasts reduced. As much as we all love her for this very reason (or maybe because there is no other to be had), as much as we'd like to see her in boys' mags with as little clothes as possible, perhaps making her breasts smaller would be just the thing for her. When people look at you and can't see that you're eight-month pregnant because of your boobies, then there's something fishy in the State of Denmark. Just saying...

P.S: OK, I just read what I put down and I must apologize to you all. Jordan CAN'T have her breasts reduced. Jordan is perfect as she is right now, matching outfits and all. Out of all the hot babes out there, she is the hottest. Ever. In the history of mankind. You see, sometimes, the other me takes complete control over my fingers. It's bad, I know, but I'm seeing a doctor about it.